


The Long Love Story of Matthew Casey and Kelly Severide

by Breathing_Destiel_97



Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: All of House 51, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Flashbacks to the Fire Academy, M/M, Shameless Smut, Shay doesn't die
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-02-10 19:16:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 27,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12918489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Breathing_Destiel_97/pseuds/Breathing_Destiel_97
Summary: The Long Love Story of Matthew Casey and Kelly Severide. (Still better than twilight)Matt/Kelly, Canon start after the Pilot and Andy Darden dies. How they go from fighting everyday to falling in love and the secret past that they share.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I've been re-watching Chicago Fire, which of course means reading fics, and I decided there's not enough Matt/Kelly in the world. So I decided to write on myself. :)  
> (Oh and I suck at naming things :)

“Severide” Casey calls. “Chief wants us.”

“Coming.” Severide shouts back as he jumps out of his chair.

“That’s what she said.” Cat-calls Capp. Followed by some chuckles from the squad guys.

“Weak, Capp, Weak.” Severide throws back as he follows Casey to the Chief’s office.

 

“Lieutenants. Have a seat.” The chief greets them. “About the …. Personal issues you two have had the last few months. Lieutenant Severide. Do you trust Lieutenant Casey?” Chief asks.

“Yes, with my life.”

“Why?” Chief pushes.

“Because.” Kelly hesitates. “He’s the best damn firefighter in the city.” Severide admitted, he meant it and hated himself that it hurt to say it.

“Lieutenant Casey, do you trust Lieutenant Severide?”

“Yes, chief. With my life.”

“Good. That’s a good start for this weekend.”

“What’s happening this weekend chief?” Casey asks sceptically.

“You two are going to a team-building seminar in Colorado.”

“I’m sorry, a what?” Severide asks not believing what he’s hearing.

“I considered forcing both of you to attend partner counselling with the department psychiatrist, but I didn’t think that would work with you to knuckleheads.”

“Thank god for small mercies.” Casey muttered to Severide, both stifling a chuckle.

“You’re serious, chief?” Kelly says disbelieving. “The department is actually flying us to Colorado to play nice with each other?”

The chief levels them with a look that could rival any parent. Both of them instantly shutting up. “Losing Andy was tough on all of us. I know the three of you were practically inseparable. And I don’t know what the hell happened between you two to make you like this. But it has to stop. This animosity between you, it affects the whole house. I will not have a badge from my house on the wall of the academy because of it. This is my last resort, and your last chance. If this doesn’t balance out when you get back. One of you will be transferred. Do you understand?”

“Yes, chief.” They answer simultaneously.

“Good.” The chief continues. “Flight lands Friday afternoon, you leave Sunday night.” Chief looks between them expression softening. “Now, I don’t expect you to come back drinking buddies. But it would be nice to go one shift without you trying to kill each other.”

“Understood chief.” Answering together again.

Chief nods his head at them. “Good. Dismissed gentlemen.”

 

They slink out of the chief’s office and down the hallway to the locker room.

“I guess it could be worse.” Casey ponders out loud.

Severide gives him a deadpan stare. “Not by much, what are we gonna spend all weekend doing trust falls and making friendship bracelets? How hard is it to be civil?”

“I don’t know, but we can’t seem to figure it out anymore.” Casey sounded defeated even to his own ears. “Maybe it’ll help or maybe one of us will have to go. Either way we’ll know.”

Casey turns to leave, but decides it’s the right time for some honesty and turns back. “For the record. I miss the way things were between us. I know we can’t bring Andy back, but it would be nice to rewind the clock, get at least one of my friends back.”

Casey left, Severide lays down on the bench and thinks about it. He hopes this weekend will change something, bring them closer. Help them get back what they lost but inside he just doubted this weekend could do that.


	2. Chapter 2

Severide had already thrown some clothes and a toothbrush in a duffle bag. When Shay popped her head in. “Casey’s here.” He was pissed that he had to spend all weekend at a seminar and skip a shift to do it.

“Great. I can’t wait.” Severide exclaims sarcastically.

Shay sits on the end of his bed. “Kelly, sit with me a sec. Listen I know you’re not exactly looking forward to this, but you and Casey have known each other since the academy. You were tight but, now I dunno. I’m just asking you to go into this weekend with an open mind. Maybe one of you will end up in the ER or maybe, just maybe, you can both let go of some of the anger and guilt I know both of you have over Andy.”

“Shay -” Kelly tries to say something but gets cut off.

“Ah. Don’t say anything just think about it. For me? And if that doesn’t work, you can get drunk.” Shay says as she hands him a bottle of tequila.

Kelly laughs, Shay knows him too well. Booze always helps. “I’ll think it over. I promise.” Shay gives him a look. “I promise! I gotta go.” Severide shoves the tequila in his bag, kisses Shay on the cheek and leaves.

 

Severide comes out the building to find, Casey and Boden.

“You here to make sure we actually go to this thing Chief?”

“Hey if you wanna pay for a cab that’s fine by me”

The three of them share a chuckle and Kelly throws his bag in the back. The ride to the airport filled with friendly conversation and banter. When Boden drops them off he has one more thing to say.

“Guys. I really hope this weekend helps. I don’t want to transfer either of you. But I will if I have to. House 51 is a family, we need you.” He gives each of them a man hug and sends them on their way. 

They’re seated apart on the flight which they are both grateful for. Kelly puts in his headphones and closes his eyes. Trying to block everything out prepare himself for the next couple of days. But he couldn’t stop thinking about what Shay said.

 

FLASHBACK TO THE ACADEMY

Locker room at the academy after a long day running drills. Matt’s getting dressed when Kelly comes in wrapped in a towel after taking a shower.

“You made good time today. Still can’t beat me though.” Severide jokes with Casey.

“Yeah, yeah. Hey you wanna go grab a beer?” Casey offers.

“Sure. Why not, I know a great place not far from here.”

They went to the bar had, probably a few too many drinks and then stumbled back to Kelly’s apartment. Drink a few more beers, then Matt gets up to leave.

“Hey man, I should get going.” Matt stumbles a little trying to find his balance.

“Nah man, you got your stuff here with you for tomorrow. You can crash on the sofa.”

“Really? Thanks man.” Matt stumbled again, Kelly grabs him to stop him falling but over balances and actually ends up pulling them both down on the sofa. Matt practically straddling him and their mouths inches apart.

 

Kelly too drunk to think it through, closes the gap between them and crashes their lips together. The kiss is harsh, not quite lining up, all tongue and teeth. Kelly has no idea how but somehow they made it to Kelly’s bedroom in one piece, stripping off clothes as they went. They fell onto the bed together still making out. Both of them down to their boxers, Matt tugs off Kelly’s boxers and takes his hard cock in hand. Matt rolls them over straddling Kelly’s thighs, giving him a hand job while kissing his neck and chest. If he wasn’t so drunk Kelly would’ve been embarrassed at how fast he came. Kelly of course repays the favour rolling Matt onto his back, laying half on top of him half next to him and kissing his neck and chest same as Matt had done.

Matt came quick and passed out even quicker. He’d drank more than Kelly had. Ever the gentlemen Kelly grabbed a wash cloth and wiped both off them down before crawling in next to Matt. Kelly’s train of thought was de-railed by the pilot’s announcement.

 

_**“Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to begin our descent, please make sure your seat backs and tray tables are in the upright position. Make sure your seatbelts are fastened and all carry-on luggage is stowed away. Thank you.”** _


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a filler chapter, let me know if I rambled on too much. But there is a little more smut from Kelly's memory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who left comments or kudos, made me smile all day. :D

The guys only had carry-ons so they skipped baggage re-claim and headed straight over to pick up the rental car.

“Hey, you wanna drive?” Casey offered knowing how much Kelly hates being a passenger.

“Nah, I’m a little tired you can drive.” Truth was Kelly’s mind was still spinning, over long since forgotten memories of “blowing off steam” with Matt after long hard days at the academy.

Kelly must have dosed off in the car. Waking with a start when Matt hit the steering wheel.

“Fuck it! I don’t know where we are.” Casey shouts.

“What? How long have I been out?” Severide grumbles pissed at being woken up.

“Like two hours. The GPS is fucked.”

“Where’s the actual map?”

“Backseat, in my bag.”

“Got it. Where’s the GPS say we are?”

“I dunno, a field.”

“Just give me the damn thing, you’re getting us lost.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? I was just following the damn GPS.”

“Just shut up and make a U-turn.”

“No the next exit will take us full circle, turning around will take longer.”

“No it won’t. Turn around.”

 

 

They were still arguing when they entered the hotel lobby.

“I told you to turn around, but no! You had to do it your way and it took over an hour.”

“Always the backseat driver Severide. Turning around would’ve taken longer and oh yeah you’re the one who programmed the damn GPS and then fell asleep. I just followed what you did. Last time I ever do that!”

There was a guy stood behind a counter, subtly clearing his throat trying to get their attention. He was a little shorter than Casey and Severide, with dark hair and hipster glasses.

“Excuse me guys.”

“What?!” They both snap at the unknown man.

“Are you guys here for the team-building seminar?”

“Yes!” They snap again. They’d been arguing too long to just stop now.

“O-kay. Could I have your names, please?”

“Kelly Severide, Matthew Casey, Chicago Fire Department.” Severide says as quickly as possible, not giving Casey a chance to answer.

“Okie dokie. Well here are your welcome packets and room keys. You’re in room 305.”

“Wait! One room?”

“Yes indeed-y. It’s a part of the team-bonding.” This guy was way too cheery, made Kelly wanna punch him in the face, just on principle.

“Kill me now.” Severide couldn’t believe this, first being sent here and now sharing a room.  

“First thing we’ve agreed on all day.” Casey grabs the room keys and storms over to the elevators.

“Well, orientation is in an hour, in the dining room. Followed by dinner.”

“Thanks.” Severide follows Casey over to the elevators before he gets locked out of the room.

 

 

The room was small and had two twin beds. They just stood there in mild shock looking around for a minute.

“Well at least we don’t have to share a bed.” Severide joked trying and failing to relieve some of the tension between them.  

“Great, I’m gonna take a shower.”

Casey disappears into the bathroom and Severide drops down onto one of the beds. “This is gonna be a long weekend.”

 

Kelly must have dosed off again while Matt was in the shower. Arguing all day really was really exhausting. Kelly woke up to the sight of Matt’s backside, he was bent over putting his boxers on. Kelly felt his dick stirring at the sight, he hadn’t looked at Matt like this in years. He has to stop thinking like this, it was crazy, one mention of the academy from Shay and now he can’t stop remembering how Matt looked. The one and only time they had actual sex, not half drunk hand jobs or blow jobs. It was the night they graduated from the academy.

How Matt looked and felt. So tight around him, not just around his dick but his whole body. Matt had clung to him, legs wrapped around his waist, arms around his neck. Watching matt come, his eyes rolling back in his head, mouth slack in a silent scream. Body trembling and muscles contracting from the intensity, the sheen of sweat that seemed to make his whole body glow.  

‘Get it together Severide. That’s all in the past. Just gotta get through the weekend.’

“I’m gonna take a shower.” ‘A cold shower.’ He had to get out of that room for a while.

 

 

Casey could swear the Severide was acting weirder by the minute. First letting him drive, apart from Tony driving squad, Kelly hates being a passenger. And now he just practically leapt off the bed, scaring the crap out of him, nearly falling over his own feet to get to the bathroom.

Whatever Matt was too tired to deal with his crap. When they lost Andy he lost the only one who knew that he was still carrying a torch for Kelly from back since the academy. Then he lost Hallie when she went off to do Medical Aid in Africa “to find herself” or whatever. And now he can’t even talk to his oldest friend without getting into an argument. Yep, It was gonna be a long weekend.

 

Kelly comes out of the bathroom in a wall of steam, a towel wrapped around his waist and even in his tired and moody state Matt had to admit he looked damn fine. Kelly keeps his back to him while he gets dressed.

“We should get going orientation starts in 5.” Matt reminds, while heading for the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, spot any mistakes let me know. :)   
> Always happy to hear suggestions too.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so I've noticed I have a nasty habit of switching from present tense to past tense. I've proof read, but if anyone spots anything or gets confused let me know. :)

Following signs to the dining room for the orientation. There was maybe twenty people milling around the room, chatting and drinking a beer or a glass of wine. In the middle of the room a bunch of tables had been pushed together to make one big table. A big guy walked towards them, he had light brown hair and had to be at least 6ft.

“Hi guys, I’m Robert the event manager. The bar is over there feel free to grab a drink, open bar just try not to get too drunk. Mill around, meet some people. There are name cards by every seat if you wanna find yours.”

They both grab a beer and separate, try to meet some other people and stay as far away from each other as possible.

“Welcome everyone, if you could all take yours seats, we can make some introductions.” Kelly recognised him as the guy with nerdy glasses from the check in desk.

There’s some quiet conversation and chairs squeaking on hardwood floors before the nerdy guy starts up again. “Well I’ll start the introductions. My name is Steve and I’m the assistant coordinator, most of you should have met Robert as well.” Nerdy Steve gestures over to the big guy. “Robert is the event manager of this shindig, so any complaints, go to him.” A solid chuckle rolls over the room.

 

Nerdy Steve has them start at one end of the table and go around introducing themselves; name, where there from and why there here. They started with a pale guy in glasses and a sweater vest, who looked like he’d never left an office in his life. Kelly sighed at his over enthusiasm, most of the people there were business people sent by companies for a fun weekend. It finally come around to Severide. Now, he could take the high road but it had been a long, long day and he just didn’t care anymore.

“Hi, I’m Kelly Severide, Chicago Fire Department. I’m here – because, my colleague is passive aggressive, can’t keep his men in line and blames me for all his short comings. Thanks.”

Kelly takes his seat, Matt scoffs at him. Alright if he wants to do this, then Matt has no problem with that.

“Hi, I’m Matt Casey, Chicago Fire Department. I’m here because I have to work with him and if he doesn’t pull his head out of his ass soon. I think I’m gonna kill him. Or at the very least put him in the ER. Thanks.”

After their introductions had been made a tension fell over the room, the remaining introductions were somehow a little less enthusiastic than before. When everyone was introduced Nerdy Steve stood up again and announced that dinner would be served. It was mac ‘n’ cheese with chicken and bacon, pretty nice actually. Casey and Severide didn’t look or talk to each other the entire time, talking to the people either side of them instead. After dinner some stayed for another drink but Casey was too tired for that.

“I’m gonna hit the rack, that was a long drive.”

“Well it could’ve been a lot shorter if you hadn’t. Never mind. I’m gonna go for a walk, clear my head. I got my room key, don’t wait up.”

 

Kelly wasn’t sure how long he walked for but his hands were numb and it was pitch black so he headed back to the hotel. Poured himself a generous double of the tequila Shay gave him, and sat on his bed just watching Matt sleep. The familiar burn of the tequila helping to keep him calm. Matt looks so peaceful. Kelly had no idea what was going on with his head, why all this ancient history was resurfacing now. Did he really have feelings for Matt? Did he have them back at the academy too? Kelly knew he had feelings all those years ago but had they gone deeper than just lust? He wasn’t sure anymore. He wished Shay was here, she always knew how to snap him out of his head. Even when he didn’t. On that thought Kelly finished his drink and fell into an uneasy sleep.

 

The alarm clock goes off at 7am, Severide mumbled some curses while rolling over to turn the damn thing off. Nearly falling on the floor in the process, not being used to such a small bed. They were narrower than the damn bunks at the firehouse. Severide stumbles out of bed, stretching his back and popping his joints, being a fire fighter really took a toll on your body. Severide tapped on the lump under the covers that was Casey.

“Come on, get up.”

“Mhhhhh. Coffee.”

“I’d forgotten, you are really not a morning person.”

“Mhhhhh.”

Severide goes and gets washed up, coming back to the same unmoving lump under the covers.

“Casey. Get up.” Severide taps on the lump again. This time unintentionally smacking Matt on the ass.

“Mhhh, no. I’m warm and comfy.” Casey groans from deep within his nest of blankets.

Severide gets dressed before losing his patience and just yanking the covers off of him. Leaving Casey in his boxers, curled up in ball in the middle of the bed.

“Fine. I’m up. I’m up. I need coffee anyway.”

“I’m gonna go get breakfast, meet you there.”

“Yep.”

Casey stumbles into the bathroom making Severide chuckle as he leaves the room.

 

 

Kelly sits with some of the people he met last night, breakfast was buffet style, pick what you want. Whatever happened with this weekend Kelly could at least say that they were well fed. Casey stumbles in about ten minutes after Kelly and headed straight for the coffee drinking two cups before getting food. Severide really had forgotten the little things about Matt, like his morning bed head. Hair sticking up in over twenty directions, stumbling around like a zombie.

After breakfast everyone was told to grab a jacket and meet outside in 10 mins. They gathered and chatted amongst themselves until they were split into two groups of ten. Big Robert took one group and Nerdy Steve took Casey and Severide’s group.  

 

“Okay first things first. We’re gonna warm up, test your flexibility and team work with a game called human knot. So if everyone could stand in a circle.”

There’s shuffling and muttering while everyone moves around, Casey ends up opposite Severide.

“Great, okay everyone put your right hand in the circle and grab another hand, then put your left hand in and do the same.”

There’s laughter amongst the group as they entangle themselves, struggling to see through the mess of arms and find a hand.

“Perfect. Now try to untangle yourselves without letting go of each other’s hands.”

Everyone groans then laughs before starting to figure out how to do this. It takes a while but in the end they figure it out. All cheering and high fiving once they have.

“That was great everyone, but just the beginning. Now, if you could all follow me.”

 

Severide bumps shoulders with Casey. “Hey, Chief would be proud of us, we haven’t argued once for a whole 45 minutes.”

“Yeah and that was actually kinda fun.”

“Do you think we’ll do some trust falls next?”

Casey laughed, he actually laughed at something he said. Kelly couldn’t remember the last time that happened.

“Okay. Onto the next game. If you could all split into the pairs you came in, please.” Nerdy Steve begins.

“Damn it, I’m telling you. Trust falls.”

Casey was still smiling at him but didn’t say anything.

 

“Right everyone sit down, back to back with your partner. Then link arms and between the two of you, communicate, work together and try to stand up.”

Some pairs take longer than others but Casey was actually enjoying this. They were joke fighting, pushing and pulling at each other like brothers would. Both smiling and laughing together the way they used to.

“Okay guys this is the final game and then we break for lunch, it is also my favourite game and I will be joining in. The game is for fun but also trust. Everyone make a circle around the bucket of water balloons. Get shoulder to shoulder and then take three steps back. The aim of the game is to _not_ pop the balloon, we’re gonna gently toss it around the circle. When I call “switch” throw it the other way around the circle. Maggie would you like to start us off. A woman steps up takes a balloon and starts them off.

They play the game for a long time popping at least a half dozen balloons before Nerdy Steve calls it quits and says lunch should be ready soon. But Kelly has always had a mischievous streak and come on, the bucket still had a ton of balloons left, so he grabs one and aims for Matt who’s walking away.

“Really Sev?!” Kelly has a moment of panic thinking he’s gone too far and set them back to square one. Then Matt bursts into a big smile, runs for the bucket and returns fire. Beginning a water fight, Steve laughs and calls back to them.

“Have fun guys! Just don’t get too cold.”

 

They run around like a couple of kids until there’s only one balloon left. Both equal distance from the bucket. They share a challenging look before racing towards it. Casey tackles Severide and they end up rolling around in the grass both soaked to the skin until they’re out of breath. Casey’s on top of Severide, pining his arms above his head. Both of them panting, mouths inches apart. Casey closes the gap and kisses Severide, soft and sweet.

The moment’s over as fast as it started.

“I’m sorry Kelly. I dunno what that was, we should head back to the room. I’m pretty cold.”

And with that Matt jumps up and starts jogging (almost running) back to the hotel. Leaving Kelly sat on his ass wondering what the hell just happened.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay I promised you all the tequila would make an appearance and some smut. Promises delivered. Gonna up the rating to explicit, I may have gotten a little carried away with the smut. You be the judge ;)

When Severide gets back to the room Casey is already in the shower. He can hear the water running through the thin hotel walls so he strips off his wet jacket, boots, socks and t-shirt, laying down on his bed and trying to make sense of the last two days. He heard the water shut off and tried to think of what to say before Casey came out. He must have taken a change of clothes in with him, because he comes out barefoot, wearing blue jeans and a baggy t-shirt. Severide sits up on the edge of the bed, Casey walks over and sits opposite him.

Casey sighs, shoulders slumped forward, struggling to look at Severide. “Kelly, what happened before. I’m sorry. I don’t know…”

“Matt I -” Severide tries to interrupt, he wasn’t sorry for what happened, just wished it had lasted longer.

“No Kelly please, just let me say this. This weekend it’s got me remembering what things were like when we were at the academy and I just got carried away. I saw something that wasn’t there anymore.” Casey was still incredibly interested in the carpet instead of looking at Severide.

Severide takes Casey’s hands in his when he still wouldn’t look up at him. “Matt look at me. Seriously it’s okay. I’ve been thinking about the academy too and they are all good memories.”

“Yeah. They are. You should take a shower, don’t want to catch a cold.” Casey squeezes his hands before letting them go again.

 

 

When Kelly gets out of the shower Matt isn’t in their room anymore. So he gets dressed, crashes on the bed and turns on the TV. Five minutes later Matt comes back in with two food containers.

“Grabbed us some lunch, sorry it took so long. That nerdy guy Steve started talking to me and just wouldn’t stop, he’s so damn cheery makes me wanna punch him in the face.”

“I know what you mean, kinda like Chout he’s so happy it’s irritating.”

“Exactly. I got us a couple of sandwiches and chips.” Matt says as he hands a container off to Kelly.

Kelly opens the container and his face lights up. “Oh, you got me extra bacon. Thanks man.” He says before shoving an entire strip of bacon in his mouth. “I love bacon!” He exclaims around the mouthful.

“I know you do. Steve said that there doing some group stuff later. Relaxation techniques, adult colouring books crap like that, probably group hugs too. But Brightside, it’s optional. So I figured instead, maybe we could hang out have a few beers do some day drinking. Unless you’re in the mood for a group hug?”

“I think I’ll pass but day drinking sounds like a damn fine idea.”

Casey grabs two beers from the fridge, pops the tops and hands one off to Kelly. They clink the necks together and finish their food and drinks when Kelly finally remembers the tequila stashed in his bag.

“I nearly forgot, Shay gave me a little something before we left.” Digging around in his duffle bag before pulling out the bottle of. “Tequila.”

“Damn it. I forgot my sombrero.”

“Shame. But I’m still drinking this.”

“Then you better share. Looks like you already broke into it.”

“I may have had a small glass last night.”

“I saw an ice machine down the hall, be right back.”

 

The guys talk for a while catching up all friendly conversation. They’re several drinks in when the mood shifts.

“Damn it Shay, she knows what tequila does to me.” Kelly was laying back on his bed with his legs hanging over the edge. Matt was sat up, resting against the headboard.

“What does tequila do to you?” Matt over enunciates to cover the slight slur in his voice, proving that he is in fact on the way to being drunk.

“You drunk already Matty?”

“No. Tipsy – Maaybe. Tequila just makes me slur a little, makes my cheeks tingle.”

“Haha. The cheeks on your face or -” Kelly was definitely on his way to being drunk too, laughing at his own joke.

“Funny, So?”

“So what?”

“What does tequila do to you?”

“Oh, nothing. Never mind.”

“No, no, no, no, no. Come on, you brought it up. Spill.”

“It makes me – horny.” Kelly admits while shrugging his shoulders

“Oh reeeally. How did I not know this when we were at the academy?”

Kelly thinks about it before sitting to answer Matt. “I didn’t need tequila, it would’ve been putting fuel on a fire. All that exercise and adrenaline pumping. Man it makes me so horny. So wait, are you saying if you knew back then, you have what poured tequila down my throat?”

“No, but it might have been useful to know about.” Matt muses on all the possible missed opportunities.

“Did it do that to you? All that exercise.” Kelly asks, wondering if that was just the reason for there … trysts?

“Yeah I guess it did. Is that all it was between us? Adrenalin.” Clearly Matt was wondering the same thing.

“No. I don’t think so anyway. Not for me. Was it for you?”

“I don’t know for sure. What happened between us, the night we graduated.” Matt hesitated wondering if he should even say this. “I was confused for months afterwards. It messed me up Kelly and Andy was the only one I could talk to about this.”

“Andy knew? He never said anything.” Kelly was surprised and impressed that Andy never let it slip.

“He figured it out somehow, guess we weren’t as subtle as we thought. I asked him not to say anything and he didn’t. I was worried it would push you away and I needed you.”

 

While they’d been talking, neither of them had noticed that they’d moved closer together. Gone from sitting on opposite beds to sitting next to each other. Their thighs almost touching, but they could still feel the inviting warmth of each other’s bodies.

“I needed you too. I still do.” Kelly admitted in an almost whisper their faces mere inches apart subconsciously leaning into each other when Kelly decides to just go for it. Cupping Matts face and going in for the kiss, Matt took a few seconds to respond still in shock but quickly getting with the programme and finding his rhythm. Kelly ran his tongue over Matt’s bottom lip asking silent permission which was gladly given. Tongues fighting for dominance both tasting the tequila they drank in each other’s mouths. Kelly runs his hand from Matt’s cheek down to his hip holding him steady while pulling him in closer. When there’s no space left between them Kelly moves his hand to the front of Matt’s jeans, feeling how hard he already is and rolling his palm over Matt’s cock. He moans and Kelly leans in to kiss his neck.

Kelly remembers every sweet spot on Matt’s body like it was yesterday, finding the sweet spot on his neck easily. Matt moans out. “Kelly.”

“I know. I got you. I got you baby.” Kelly whispers sweetly in his ear. He breaks contact to take off his shirt, then helps Matt get his off, undoing his jeans before laying him down on the bed. Kelly laves kisses over Matt’s neck and chest, zeroing in on the sweet spot by his collar bone, sucking a hickey into the skin to mark his territory. Suddenly he sees the abandoned ice bucket on the night stand in his peripheral vision, a sly thought entering his head. Distracting Matt with a deep kiss then moving over to his neck, Kelly reaches into the bucket and grabs an ice cube. Popping it into his mouth and holding it between his lips before running it down Matt’s body. Starting at the dip between his collar bones, down to just above his boxers. Matt lets out a surprised gasp at the cold sensation, Kelly works his way back up and over Matt’s nipples, running the ice cube overreach bud until its stiff and hard before spitting the cube across the room, leaning back in breathing hot air over the hard buds sucking at and nibbling on them. Relishing the pants, moans and groans he was dragging out of Matt. Matt was a writhing mess, thrusting up against Kelly seeking any kind of friction, holding tight onto Kelly’s shoulders nails digging into the muscle on his back.

 

“Kelly wait.” Matt gasps. Kelly stops immediately worried Matt thought this was a mistake and looking him in the eye.

“What’s wrong baby?”

“Mhhhh, nothing. I really, really want this, but I don’t have anything with me. Do you?”

Kelly grins, jumping up and running over to his duffle bag. He hadn’t even realised how hard he was, all his attention had been on Matt, but he was pretty sure he could cut glass at this point. Tossing the lube on the bed and scrambling to get his jeans and boxers off, then helping Matt get his off, tugging them off his lower legs and over his feet before throwing behind him to be found later. Matt spreads his legs open and inviting Kelly in. Kelly looks at him like a starving animal staring down its prey before jumping back on the bed and claiming Matt’s mouth in a filthy kiss.

“I don’t have any condoms though, that okay?”

“Yeah. I don’t care. I’m clean, you?”

“Clean.”

With that out the way, Kelly kisses Matt once more then moving down his body and taking the hard cock into his mouth. Taking it in all the way to the base and hollowing his cheeks and sucking, holding Matt’s hips to keep him still, gripping strong enough to probably leave bruises. When Kelly hollowed his cheeks Matt’s hands had shot down to Kelly’s one hand running through his hair the other gripping his shoulder tight.

Kelly popped the cap on the lube, Matt spreading his legs at the sound. Probing Matt’s tight hole with his fingertip, circling a few time before breeching the tight ring of muscle. Matt lets out a deep breath he didn’t know he was holding. Kelly working the single digit in and out for a minute before adding a second, Matt sighing at the stretch.

Matt’s fingers pull on Kelly’s short hair, pulling his head up and off his cock. Panting out, “If you keep doing that I’m gonna cum.”

“Wanna see you come.”

“Want you inside me first.” Kelly growls at that, it comes from deep in his chest, he couldn’t o stopped it if he’d tired. Angling his fingers to hit Matt’s prostate. The bundle of nerves sets off fireworks behind Matts eyes, throwing his head back and gasping out. “Kelly!”

Matt feels like he’s floating, heat coiling in his belly, cock so hard it’s touching his stomach, pre-cum pooling by his belly button. He feels the fingers inside him withdraw and whines at the loss.

“Hey baby, look at me. I’m here. I got you.” Kelly reassures him, holding eye contact while reaching for the bottle of lube again. Lubing up hi cock and adding some more to Matt’s hole for good measure.

 

Matt wraps his legs around Kelly’s waist, feeling the blunt tip against him and bracing for the burn to come. Kelly enters him slowly inch by torturous inch, finally bottoming out and holding still to let him adjust. Both panting and gazing into each other’s eyes they share a kiss so full of love. Matt tightens his legs pulling Kelly in closer.

“Move your ass Severide.”

“Yes Sir.”

Kelly sets a steady rhythm and it only takes a few thrusts for Matt to start rolling his hips up to meet each thrust. Kelly changes the angle slightly, now hitting the magical bundle of nerves on every thrust, a moan getting punched out of Matt every time. Sounds of sex and skin slapping skin fill the room, neither of them caring if the entire hotel could hear them. Kelly’s so close, he reaches for Matt’s cock but it gets slapped away.

“Don’t need it.”

With renewed energy Kelly thrusts increase in speed and strength. His balls so tight Kelly thought they might disappear back inside him. Matt’s back arches up and he cries out.

“Kelly! I – I’m gonna.” His orgasm burning deep inside him, taking over his entire body, eyes rolling back in his head. Cumming all over both their stomachs. Kelly fucks him through it but he’s so tight, clenching around him. He falls, tumbling over the edge with Matt.

Both men catching their breath then sharing a sweet kiss before Kelly pulls out and rolls over. Cuddling up behind Matt they fall asleep, completely blissed out.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick question. What are the feelings on top Severide bottom Matt and Bottom Severide Top Matt.  
> Any preferences????


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I'm really sorry this took me so long to update. Christmas madness hit the house, then I had some issues with my anxiety and before you know it it's new years and my evil baby cousins give me the cold from hell. But I apologise and ask your forgiveness with a long chapter. :)   
> \--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> Okay I’m not a fan of Casey’s family on the show. So in this he still has a sister but I doubt she’ll make an appearance and he lost both of his parents in a fire as a child, which is why he became a firefighter. I imagine him and his sister would be raised by another family member but again I doubt they’ll make an appearance.   
> Matt and Hallie broke up she didn’t die but went to South America to do volunteer doctor stuff.

Matt wakes up stretching away the soreness in his muscles and smiling at the memory of the night before.

“Morning sunshine.” Kelly whispers in his ear and kisses his temple. He’d been awake for a while, content to just watch Matt sleeping peacefully.

“We forgot to clean up last night.” Matt mumbles.

“What?” Severide questions, confused what Matt is talking about, they made a lot of mess last night.

“There’s dried cum on my stomach and – other places. Ew.”

“Ew. Shower?”

“Mhhh, I’m warm and comfy.”

“I’ll join you then, keep you warm. Then you can drink your body weight in coffee at breakfast.”

“Sounds good.”

 

 

Breakfast was pretty much the same as the day before except the tension between them was gone, conversation easy and comfortable. They sat and ate breakfast with the others, all laughing and joking about the day before and speculating what today would bring.

After breakfast Nerdy Steve and Big Rob corralled everyone into another large function room. In the middle of the room was twenty chairs facing inwards, making a circle with a space on either side to get in and out.

“Alright guys, everyone take a seat and we’ll get started.” Casey swore if Nerdy Steve called them guys one more time, he was gonna knock that permanent smile off his face. Once everyone was seated the smiling fool started up again.

“First we’re gonna play a game called Truth and Lies. We go around the circle and you tell us two personal truths and a lie, but don’t tell us which is which. We all guess which one is the lie and then the partner you came with takes a guess before you confirm which one the lie was.” They start with the woman closest to Nerdy Steve and it works its way around to Matt, Kelly was confident he could spot his lie a mile away.

“Okay, two truths and a lie. I have one sister but no brothers. I’m allergic to strawberries and I can’t play any musical instrument.”

Kelly was right, he saw the lie but it wasn’t too difficult for him. The group thought Matt’s allergy to strawberries was the lie. “Okay, Kelly would you like to take a guess at Matts lie.” Nerdy Steve asked him like he’d asked everyone else. “Sure Matt has one sister and no brothers, except for at the fire house. He is seriously allergic to strawberries and can play, guitar, piano and I’m sure there’s another one I’m forgetting.”

“Matt is Kelly right?”

“Yeah, he got it all right.”

“Wow you guys know each other really well.”

Kelly suddenly realises it’s his turn and he hasn’t thought of anything, he was too busy looking at Matt.

“Erm. Honestly I haven’t thought of anything yet, gonna have to think on my feet. Okay I hate olives, I can’t remember a time when I didn’t want to be a firefighter. And I’m pretty certain that I’ve only been in love once in my life, but I broke it off because I was scared.” Kelly surprised himself that he’d actually said that out loud and judging by how Matt’s eyebrows disappeared into his hairline he was too. Nobody in the group wanted to touch Kelly’s love life admission with a ten foot pole. 

“Matt any guesses on Kelly’s lie?” Nerdy Steve asks after the group decided hating olives was the lie.

“Sure, he loves olives, eats them like grapes. It’s disgusting.” Matt’s voice showing genuine yet affectionate disgust at Kelly’s taste.

“Kelly was that your lie?”

“Yeah it was my lie.” 

 

 

“Scoreboard 1 to me, you nil point.” Matt leaned in and whispered to Kelly.

“You wanna play it like that, fine. Loser has to give the winner a blow job.” Kelly of course retaliates raising the stakes.

“You’re going down, literally.” Matt wiggles his eyebrows at Kelly making him laugh. Kelly puts his hand on Matt’s thigh and Matt puts a hand on Kelly’s back. They stay like this leaning in close to each other and not really listening while everyone else tells their truths and lies. It felt like they were they only ones in the room, leaning in close to each other. Until Nerdy fucking Steve broke the moment, Kelly was almost certain at this point that he would knock this guy out before their flight home tonight.

 

“This next game requires you guys to get back in your pairs, so if you each wanna grab your chair and spread yourselves out around the room, facing your partner. We’re gonna play, I guess you could call it a version of 20 questions designed to build connections and strengthen the bond between partners. So, I will read out a question and give you a few minutes so both of you can answer the question. When everyone was settled Nerdy Steve began.

 

#(This section is done literally as questions and answers, the chapter ended up way too long and boring by adding in Matt said or Kelly said. So I just kinda skipped it.)#

 

1). what would constitute a perfect day for you?

Severide: “A 12 hour shift, some good fires, daring rescues. No causalities, no deaths. Watch a film on the sofa with you and Shay; beer, popcorn, pizza. Finish the night with some good sex.”

Casey: “Damn that sounds good. Okay my day, start with a run, good breakfast, lots of coffee. A 12 hour shift sounds nice, I’m stealing that from you. A black hawks game with beer at Molly’s and everyone from the house. Then what was it you said, finish the night with some good sex.”

 

2). Name three things you and your colleague have in common.

Severide: “Blue eyes, Shay, great hair.”

Casey: “Haha we both love being firefighters, hate being wrong, both like cigars, fishing and the Blackhawks.”

Severide: “I think that was more than three.”

 

3). If a crystal ball could tell you the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

Casey: “Be nice to know what’s gonna happen between us.”

Severide: “I can imagine it but I definitely don’t want to know how I die. I guess it would be nice to know if I’ll be happy, ever have a real home or a family of my own. I’ve always worried I’ll end up like Benny.”

Casey: “I’ve known you for long enough to be sure that you are nothing like Benny.”

Severide: “Thanks, but it’s still something I worry about, I’m good at pushing people away like him.”

 

4). What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

Severide: “Making squad, no question about it.”

Casey: “Making lieutenant.”  

 

5). Tell your colleague three things you admire about them.

Casey: “You’re the cockiest son of a bitch I’ve ever met, but you’d help a total stranger, no questions asked. You’re great at your job and you have excellent taste in whiskey and cigars.”

Severide: “That I do. Okay three things I admire about you. You’re dedicated to your job. You don’t care about being on squad, you know how much of a difference you can make exactly where you are. You care about the men under your command and the people you save, you’d risk your life to save either one, and it’s also one of the things I hate about you. You’re not cocky you work at it, you push yourself further. You can build a house with your own two hands, I couldn’t do that, if I tried I think one gust of wind would knock the whole thing down. I admire how resilient you are, you’ve had some shit deals in your life, lost your parents in a fire, and you became a fire fighter. You bounce back, don’t let anything break you, you’re a fighter even when it’s easier to lay down and fall apart, you don’t.”

 

 

6). Share an embarrassing moment.

Casey: “Okay my first fire I was so pumped I forgot to switch on the air for my mask and didn’t last long before I had to be dragged out.”

Severide: “Haha rookie mistake, we’ve all been there, not me but you know. I’m just that good.”

Casey: “Shut up your turn.”

Severide: “When I was like 8 or 9 years old at the fire fighters barbecue with my dad and his second wife, I think and I was showing off.”

Casey: “Shocking.”

Severide: “Shut up, I was doing wheelies on my bike and I was doing pretty good, until. I went over the handle bars, lost my two front teeth, broke my nose, my wrist and my arm.”

Casey: “Wow. That’s impressive.”

 

7). When did you last cry in front of another person? Or by yourself?

Severide: “I honestly can’t remember. Probably with Shay, probably after we lost someone at a fire.”

Casey: “Last time I really remember was with Christy after our mum and dad died.”

 

8). When did you last sing, to yourself or in front of someone?

Casey: “Drunk karaoke with Hallie and her doctor friends.”

Severide: “I like to sing in the shower.” Severide blushes and looks away from Matt, then they both share a little chuckle.  

 

9). If you were to die tomorrow with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? And why haven’t you told them yet?

Severide: “I haven’t told you, because, I don’t know why but - I don’t know how I’d cope if you weren’t in my life.”

Casey: “I never told you but you remember when we were at the academy and your house and car keys ‘disappeared’ and you spent the weekend at my place and we spent the entire time in bed.”

Severide: “Yeah.”  

Casey: “I ‘borrowed’ your keys and put them back in your locker on Monday.”

Severide: “You sneaky bastard, I thought I’d just lost them. That was a good weekend though.”

 

 

“Okay one last game before we wrap for lunch. Sit facing and close to each other, now I’m gonna set a timer for two minutes and you are gonna look into your partners eyes the entire time. No talking, no communicating just looking at the other person but focusing on their eyes. Before anyone asks yes you can blink, someone asks that every time. And go.

 

Matt and Kelly sit and look at each other’s eyes both really uncomfortable.

“This is kinda weird.”

“We’re not supposed to talk.”

“Sorry.”

“This is kinda weird though.”

“You’re eyes have a little green in them.”

They spend the rest of the two minutes wrapped up in each other, losing track of time and everyone around them.

 

“And done. Right folks that wraps up the morning, lunch will be served in about 30 minutes and then you’ll have an hour of free time before we meet up again.” Nerdy Steve.

 

 

Lunch is not much different than breakfast was, they sat with people they had met over the weekend and made pleasant conversation over a good meal. After lunch they decided to go for a short run, neither of them used to the lack of exercise over the last few days. They returned to the hall a few minutes before Nerdy Steve tried to regain there attention.  

 

 

“This game is called winner, loser and it may be harder but more important for some of you than others. Okay so pick a memory, a negative memory, a time when something went wrong, something that involved both of you, could be work or personal but it has to be true. Partner A picks the memory and discusses it with partner B, partner B must stay silent while partner A talks. When they’ve finished talking, partner B will discuss the memory from their point of view and it is partner A’s turn to stay silent. Both of you must try to see the situation from the other’s point of view, then work together to find the positive aspects of what happened and finally discuss and try to understand and resolve any negative aspects.”

 

They both sit and stare at each other for nearly a minute before Matt bites the bullet and speaks first. “Well I guess we both know what we gotta talk about, right?”

“Andy.” Severide

“Yeah.”

“You wanna go first?” Severide offers.

“Why not. Okay, so Truck arrived on scene first, a woman told us there was a man on the second floor. I told Otis to place the aerial. Squad went to vent the back of the house to vent. Darden and me went up the ladder, I asked you over the radio if there was a vent and before you could answer Darden had already broken the window. I told him to wait but he said it was good and went through the window. Then I heard you over the radio say there was no vent, I called Andy to back out, and heard you call over the radio to get down. I called out to Andy again, but I could already see the fire coming up the stairs, I saw him burn. I had to duck to avoid the flames but when I looked up I couldn’t see him anymore.

I came down that ladder and I felt numb, I couldn’t believe what happened. Then I heard you were hurt and I rushed to find you, just thinking that I couldn’t lose you too. And you just looked at me with such anger and hatred that I thought it was all my fault.

I told him not to go in, but he did. I know it wasn’t your fault and it wasn’t my fault either. I just needed someone to blame because it felt like my mistake. But it was his own mistake, he didn’t wait for conformation of a vent, he rushed in.”

 

Severide tells the accident from his point of view.

“Capp pulled me out, checked me over and told me about Andy I just couldn’t understand it and felt this wave of anger, I’m sorry for aiming it at you, I think I aimed it at everyone and not just that day. I was angry at myself too, Andy was kinda like my kid brother, he’d been following me around like a shadow since school.

We lost Andy and that hurt. But I felt guilty because when I woke up the next morning my first thought was – thank god it wasn’t you. I don’t know what I’d do if that happened to you. It would break me.”

Kelly is choked up by this point and Matt is welling up on the verge of tears. “I need some air.” Matt practically whispers, wiping at the corner of his eye, standing and leaving the room. Kelly leans back in his chair and takes a moment to reflect and gather himself before leaving to find Matt. They’d come so far they had to put this behind them today, once and for all.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this is kind of a filler chapter and a little bumpy I won't lie, just needed a way to connect the story.  
> I'm gonna start writing things out a little differently from the next chapter just because there will be more characters from the firehouse and I don't wanna end every sentence with he said she said.

Severide follows Casey outside and finds him sitting on a bench with his hoodie pulled up, hiding his face. “Mind if I sit?” Severide asks.

“Go ahead. Sorry I walked out, I just needed a minute.” Casey explains.

“It’s alright I needed a minute before I followed you out.” Severide moves closer and puts his hand on Casey’s knee.  “Listen to me Matt. There’s been a lot of apologising this weekend and a lot of blame and anger over the last month but we gotta move on from this once and for all. It wasn’t my fault, it wasn’t your fault, there is no one to blame. Maybe Andy for not waiting, but being angry at a dead man is pointless.”

“I know you’re right and I don’t blame you or me. I guess this weekend just made me realise how much I miss him.” Casey takes a deep breath and tries to calm his nerves before asking. “Sev? Are we good? Like really good? Because I miss having you as my friend, we used to be able to talk about anything.”

“I’ve missed you too and I think we are good. I want to get back to normal and I want my friend back. What happened with Andy I needed someone to blame and it’s easier to blame someone else than it is to blame yourself.”

The two Lieutenants sit in a comfortable silence for a few minutes.  

“We should probably get back in there.” Severide reminds Casey.

“Yeah, I think I’m gonna go up to the room and lay down for a bit instead.”

“Okay I’ll let Steve know then I’ll come up too. I’m beat.”

 

When Severide gets back to the room Matt is laying on top of the bed covers half asleep.

“Hey sleeping beauty.” Matt mumbles something in acknowledgment of his presence, while Kelly dumps his jacket and boots. “I spoke to Steve he said we don’t need to go back down and he’s gonna pass us.” Severide takes a minute to just look at Matt. “You look really comfy, mind if I join you?”

Matt shuffles up to the edge of the bed leaving space behind him. “I’d like that.” Kelly curls up behind him and they both fall asleep in minutes.

 

 

Kelly wakes up a few hours later, checking the time before attempting to wake Matt. “Matt. Wake up.”

“Mhhhhhhhh.”

“Come on baby, we gotta pack flights in a few hours.”

The guys pack up and Matt checks them out of the hotel while Kelly grabs two to-go coffees. Kelly drives them back to the airport, they manage not to get lost or argue. They’re sat next to each other on the flight home, discreetly holding hands the entire time.

Matt is sat in the window seat, staring out at Chicago skyline beneath them. “What you looking at Casey?”

“The city. It’s really beautiful, all lit up at night.”

“Yeah, it really is.” Except he wasn’t looking at the view, he was looking at Casey.

 

 

Shay picks them up from the airport, meeting them at the arrivals gate.

“What’s shaking sparkles?” Kelly greats as Shay runs over jumping on him to give him a hug.

“So you’re both still alive. No limping, no obvious bruising. I’m gonna call this weekend a success.”

“Yeah weekend wasn’t so bad.” Matt admits.

“Great don’t know about you guys but I’m starving. Pizza, beer, TV?  Matt you’re joining us.”

“I don’t know Shay, I’m pretty tired.”  

“Wasn’t a question. Let’s go.” Shay walks away laughing leading the guys to the car.

The three of them catch up over food and beer, it was just like old times. By the time they’re all ready for bed everyone’s too drunk to drive, so Matt crashes on the couch since none of them are working tomorrow.

Matt leaves in the morning after coffee, leaving Kelly and Shay in the kitchen. “Did you eat my yoghurt?”

“I didn’t touch your yoghurt.”

“So how did the weekend go?”

“It was fine. Didn’t kill each other and we’re good.”

“So that’s it huh? Nothing else happened?”

“What do you want me to say? We did the group stuff, we talked, we drank the tequila you gave us. Nothing else happened.”

“Okay I’ll drop it.” Shay walks away and under her breath says. “For now.”

 

The next day they’re all on shift. A normal shift, bit quiet but with all the usual shenanigans. At the end of shift Boden calls the lieutenants into his office.

“I have to say I am pleased. You two went an entire shift with no problems. The weekend did some good then?”

“Yes chief, we still got some stuff to work out but yeah. We’re good.” Casey.

“Kelly, you feel the same way?”

“Yeah chief. We’re getting there. Hate to say it but the weekend helped.” Severide.

“Good now get out of my office. I got work to do. And Casey, your new candidate starts next shift.”

“Got it. Thanks chief.” Casey.

 

They leave the chiefs office and head to the locker room to change out.

“Hey Casey, you wanna grab breakfast?” Severide asks tentatively.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah that sounds good.”

They drive separately to the local diner they used to eat at all the time. They both order coffee and pancakes. Sitting in silence until the food arrives.

“I haven’t been here in ages, you? They make really good pancakes and the coffee’s not bad either. Pretty good actually.”

“Sev.”

“Yeah.”

“You’re babbling.”

“Yeah, sorry. I don’t really know what to say. I’m happy we can work together again without fighting, but where are we outside of work?”

“I’m not sure, maybe we just need to spend some time together. See what happens.”

“Yeah maybe, except I can’t stop thinking about. You know the night we drank the tequila.”

“Yeah. I’ve been thinking about that too. But what does it mean? Was it just because we we’re talking about the old days, old feelings or was it more? Do you even want more?”

“I’m not exactly sure what I want but I can’t describe how I feel about you either.”

“Then maybe for now, we should just be friends. If anything happens then it happens and if it doesn’t then we’re still friends.”

Severide nods his agreement and they finish their breakfast, talking about work, friends, everything and nothing. It was comfortable both of them were starting to feel like real friends again.

 

When Severide gets back to the apartment it’s almost lunch time and Shay is in the kitchen making a sandwich.

“Hey where’ve you been?”

“I had breakfast with Casey.”

“Ooh. So things really are better between you guys?”

“Yeah I guess.” Severide drops down on the couch with a sigh.

“What’s goin’ on with you? Is something wrong? Did something happen this weekend?”

“No! Maybe. Shay I don’t know if I did something stupid or made one of the best mistakes of my life.”

“Well then let’s talk it out. But first you are gonna have to tell me what happened.”

“I slept with Casey.”

“WHAT?! How the hell did that happen?”

“Okay so I never told you about this before but me and Casey kinda had a thing going when we we’re in the academy. We were friends and then it was just -.”

“Say it!”

“Don’t rush me woman. We would - blow off steam but it was only ever hand jobs or blow jobs. We only ever actually slept together once, the night we graduated and this weekend we were talking about Andy, he was at the academy with us and apparently he knew. He figured it out or something and Matt asked him not to say anything and he didn’t. Talking about old times, old memories plus drinking tequila, I guess we just got carried away.”

“But?”

“I don’t know. It’s just that night, everything felt right. And the next day we ended up.”

Severide clams up again and Shay just gives him a look. Not having to say anything this time.

“We, I dunno cuddled. I hate that word.”

“Awwww. That’s so sweet.”

“Stop it.”

“Sorry. So what does this mean? Do you want a relationship with Casey? Wait are you bi? Is Casey bi? Who’s the bottom?”

“Wow. Okay I don’t know about Casey but he’s the only guy I’ve ever looked at like that or done anything with.”

“Okay, so you like Casey. You think Casey’s hot. You wanna fu-.”

“Enough!”

“I’m done, I swear. But seriously do you want a relationship with him, you don’t really do relationships?”

“I know that, I suck at relationships. But maybe things could be different with Matt. We talked about it over breakfast, decided to just be friends and see if anything happens. If it happens it happens and if it doesn’t it doesn’t.”

“Well maybe that’s for the best. For now anyway, you guys only started talking to each other again less than a week ago after daily arguments for what a month.”

“Yeah I know. I just, I’m not even sure how I feel about any of this. Guess I just need to wrap my head around it. I’m gonna go for a run.”

“Okay. Kelly. You know I’m here, whenever you wanna talk, about anything.”

“I know.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I've broken this into two chapters just because it was too long.   
> I would love to know what you guys think about the new way I've written it out and if you think it's clear what's happening and not confusing.

_Shift started about two hours ago, no calls yet but Otis is giving a tour to some kids from the local school. Cruz is sat outside on engine 51 cleaning his boots when a young kid walks up in a CFD jacket._

Peter Mills: “Hey I’m. My name is peter mills I’m the new candidate on 81.”

Joe Cruz: “Oh, fantastic. Joe Cruz. We’ve been waiting for you.”

Mills: “Really great.”

Cruz: “So Peter Mills? Is it?”

Mills: “Pete, actually. I –”

Cruz: “Okay, Peter Mills. Right this way. So uh, gym’s through there. There’s a TV in the kitchen but satellite’s busted. Uh, equipment room. Rescue squad A-holes. They think they own that table. Kitchen. Tower.”

_Mills stops and looks around the apparatus floor trying to take it all in. The shiny red trucks, all the equipment, the noise of the K-12 saw revving. He felt like a little kid living his dream._

Cruz: “Peter Mills, keep moving.”

Mills: “Yeah.”

Cruz: “Hey Otis, this is Peter Mills.”

Otis: “Yeah, I’m giving a tour.”

Cruz: “Peter Mills is own new candidate.”

_Mills thinks Otis is going to shake his hand, so he holds his out only to have a helmet thrust at him._

Otis: “Peter Mills, it’s all yours.”

Mills: “Um who wants to try on a helmet?”

_Mills regrets it as soon as he says it, since the kids are already wearing helmets and he has no idea what he’s supposed to do next._

_In the common room with the guys._

Herrmann: “Throw in for cooking club. Hey, short arms, long pockets. Yeah, you.”

Capp: “How’d Herrmann get the chef job?”

Mouch: “No gag reflex.”

Casey: “Otis what happened to your tour?”

Otis: “Our new candidate.”

 

_Casey heads out to see this new lump of clay that he has the responsibility of turning into a firefighter. The new candidate is in full gear, explaining the PASS alarm to the kids._

Mills: “So this is called a pass alarm. Now if a firefighter is totally still for more than 18 seconds, a loud alarm goes off until he moves again.”

Kid: “Why?”

Mills: “Well, if he’s hurt or trapped, we’ll know where to find him.”

_Mills sets the alarm off to prove his point and the kids all cover the ears._

Kids: “That’s loud.”

Mills: “See, this house is special because it has a rescue squad. Squad three serves a big piece of the city. They’re experts at water rescue, extraction, pretty much everything. They’re like the best of the best.”

Kid: “Why aren’t you with them?”

Mills: “Well I’m new, but I plan to be. My father was a member of this squad years ago.”

Casey: “Mills, right? Last to show first to go. That’s the rescue squad.”

_They may be friends again but there’s nothing wrong with gentle ribbing. It’s what friends are for, to take the piss out of each other._

Severide: “You truck guys do such a good job getting everything ready for us. Why would we want to take that away from you?”

Casey: “Kids, you should know they make the rescue helmets extra big to fit their heads inside them.”

Severide: “There are two types of firefighters. Those who are on squad, and those who wish they were on squad.”

Casey: “Ohhhhhh.”

Mills: “Come on kids.”

_Mills moves the kids on not sure if the lieutenants are serious or just having fun with each other. Casey goes back inside with his coffee, sharing a smile with Severide first. They’d both missed this. Not five minutes later the bells go off with the first call of the day, the familiar electronic voice filling the house._

Dispatch: “Pin-in accident. Columbus Drive Bridge. Ambulance 61, engine 51, truck 81, squad three, battalion 25.” 

Cruz: “Let’s go! Let’s go!”

_Everyone hurries into their trucks, pulling away, lights and sirens blaring. When they’re in the truck Casey turns around to instruct the new boy._

Casey: “Mills shadow Mouch.” _Mouch raises his hand in a mini salute not having spoken to Mills yet._ “Walk with a purpose, but don’t run. Take it all in, know the details of the situation before you act. Oh, and Mills, don’t be a crow.”

_Mills nods his head, taking the information in, trying to control the adrenaline and prepare for the unknown. He didn’t understand what Casey had said about being a crow, but he’d have to figure that out later._

 

  _Arriving on scene. The guys jump out and Casey heads over the driver’s side of the car._

 

Casey: “Ma’am? Can you hear me?”

Woman: “My daughter Madeline?”

 

Casey: “Hey Cruz! Grab the saw!”

 

Woman: “Madeline! My little girl.”

Casey: “I see her. She’s okay. Get the jaws.”

 

Boden into radio: “This is chief Boden, I’m gonna need two more ambulances and a helicopter.”

 

_Shay and Dawson arrive on scene, Casey calls out the situation._

Casey: “Mother, daughter trapped. Both responsive.”

 

_Dawson heads over to the daughter in the backseat._

Dawson: “Can you hear me?”

Casey: “Madeline.”

Dawson: “Madeline? Are you hurt, honey?”

_Madeline whines and nods her head._

 

Dawson: “Okay, can you tell me where you’re hurt?”

Madeline: “My body.”

Dawson: “Okay, you mean your tummy or your chest?”

Madeline: “My chest.”

_The woman is helped out of the driver’s seat and turns around to try to comfort her daughter._

 

Woman: “Madeline, mommy loves you. Everything’s gonna be okay. Madeline look at mommy.”

Dawson: “Listen, Madeline. I want you to see if you can turn your head towards me. Can you do that?”

 

_When the mom is out Dawson crawls in that way to the backseat. Casey finally gets the door open and Shay moves in to help check on the girl._

 

Vargas: “It’s dumping gas.”

_Vargas calls out before the front end of the car bursts into flames. The engine guys jump into action and put the fire out quickly. Madeline is increasingly scared and Dawson tries to calm her down._

 

Dawson: “It’s okay.”

Madeline: “I’m scared.”

 

Shay: “Whoa, whoa, whoa, look at her jugular.”

Dawson: “It’s all right, sweetie. Muffled heart sounds. It’s Beck’s triad.”

Shay: “Come on, sweetie.”

Dawson: “Gentle. Easy.”

 

_Shay picks Madeline up and carries here over to the rig. The guys clean up the scene and head back to the house.  When they get back Otis corners Casey._

 

Otis: “Say lieutenant, now that we have a new candidate, I don’t have to be Otis anymore.”

Casey: “You’re still Otis.”

Otis: “But I thought I could learn to drive the truck and we could put Peter Mills on the elevators.”

Casey: “Herrmann, what’s this guy’s name?”

Herrmann: “Otis.”

Casey: “No, his real name.”

Herrmann: “Bart?”

Otis: “Brian. Brian Zvonecek. He knew.”

Casey: “You’re staying on elevators, which makes you Otis. Sorry.”

 

_The rest of shift goes smoothly, pretty quietly actually so Casey does some truck drills to break in the new guy. After shift Herrmann has some personal issues to deal with._

“Mr. Herrmann? I’m David Talbott, an attorney with the Sheriff’s department.”

“Yeah. No problem. We’re all out. There’s a dryer down in the basement I couldn’t get out by myself, but otherwise, you know.”

“We’ll take care of it.”

_Hermann goes to hand him the keys_

“Oh, no, uh, we’ll change the locks.”

“Yeah, right.”

_The attorney goes into the house and Herrmann tosses the keys as far away as he can._

 

_Next shift everyone’s on the apparatus floor, double checking gear and getting ready for the day._

Dawson: “Yo, Peter Mills! My partner Shay, she’s been asking about you. Been talking about you all morning.”

Otis: “I heard she’s a monster. Dude I know over at 19, he walked with a hitch for a week.”

Mills: “Ah, you guys are busting my balls.”

Herrmann: “Listen to me, kid. I just lost my house to foreclosure because I took a bath in the market. We’re now living with my in-laws, which is two bedrooms shy of unpleasant. My wife won’t take her birth control because the pope said if she did, god would cry, so I’m not having any sex. So if there’s any chance that I could live vicariously through you, it’s literally all I got.”

Mills: “Alright.” _Swagger’s over to Shay, who’s sitting in the back of the Ambo._ “Hey.”

Shay “Hey.”

Mills: “I’m Peter Mills. Uh Pete.”

Shay: “Uh-huh. Peter Mills. Can you hand me that box right there?”

Mills: “Uh, yeah.”

Shay: “Thanks.” 

Mills: “So the little girl from the bridge accident, she okay?”

Shay: “You really are new, aren’t you? Listen. We get ‘em to the doctor best we can and then we move on. It’s the only way to make it here.”

Mills: “Uh, yeah yeah. So, um I was thinking I mean, I was wondering do you maybe wanna hook up for a beer or dinner or something?”

Shay: “Peter Mills, are you gay?”

Mills: “Me? No.”

Shay: “Because I am.”

 

_Lunch time at the house finds everyone in the common room._

Mills to Otis: “How long were you the candidate here?”

Otis: “Not long, four years.”

_Cruz comes in swinging his arms and complaining._

Cruz: “I can’t believe we’re gonna miss the fights tonight.”

Boden: “Well, that’s just as well, ‘cause I just found out he fought golden gloves.”

Cruz: “That was 20 years ago, chief. We gotta tape it or something. We gotta see it.” _Cruz walks over to Herrmann and asks._  “What’s the lieutenant doing?”

Herrmann: “He said he wanted to cook the Saturday corned beef.” _Casey pulls the gourmet looking feast out of the oven._ “Ah, look at that.”

Mouch: “He made the best chicken parmigiana I ever put in my mouth.” _Mouch throws in his two cents from the couch._

Cruz: “What do you got there, Casey?”

Casey: “Don’t you worry about it. Call everyone to chow.”

_Capp heads out to the squad table._

Capp: “Hey, Casey’s in there cooking.”

Hadley: “Casey?”

Capp: “Yeah.”

_They all head into the kitchen knowing how good a cook Casey is. The guys were a little nervous knowing how tense things had been between the lieutenants lately. When Severide grabbed a plate they let out a sigh of relief,_

Casey: “Have at it.”

Otis: “Say Herrmann. You think maybe you just bought a little too much house?”

Herrmann: “I was preyed upon by low-interest loan vultures.”

Casey: “What time is the mayor coming?”

Herrmann: “I heard 9:00”

Otis: “I heard he stops to take a piss in every house in the city – as a sign of respect.”

Herrmann: “Hey, Boden’s about to fight in ten minutes.”

Casey: “Screw it. Let’s take a ride.”

All: “Let’s take a ride.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2

_The trucks pulls up to the gym and they raise the ladder, Otis and Herrmann climb up with the radio to do a commentary for the rest of the guys._

Announcer: “Fighting in the red corner, for the Chicago Fire Department, Chief Boden.”

 _Cheers and applause._  

Otis: “Hello, sports fans. This is Brian Zvonecek, coming to you live from the annual battle of the badges. Firefighters versus the police.

 _Back in the house Capp and Hadley are sat by the radio in the tower._  

Severide: “What’s that?”

Capp: “That’s Otis.”

_Back at the gym._

Otis: “I hope you all are ready for this. Boden looks like a heat-seeking missile as he climbs into the ring to take on Captain Olmstead from the CPD. Olmstead, of course looks like the quivering cop slob that he is. Chief Boden first won back in 1992, when he was part of the esteemed truck 81, the greatest truck in all of Chicago. There goes the bell, and here we go. Takes two quick jabs to the nose. Oh, he falls back into the ropes. One, two, three to the chin. Boden’s in trouble already, folks. Wait. Here it comes. Three straight lefts.

_Bells go off. At the house the squad jump into the truck, 81 lowers the ladder, load up and go._

Dispatch: “Accident. Building fire. 241 Franklin Street. Ambulance 61, engine 51, truck 81, squad 3.”

Vargas: “That’s just down the block.”

Casey: _To dispatch._ “81 responding.” _To the guys._ “We’re rolling.”

Dispatch: “Copy that 81.”

 

_81 pulls up to the fire._

Herrmann: “This is bad, bad, bad.”

Casey: “Let’s go!  Otis, get to the elevator and tell us what we’re looking at. Mills, help Cruz vent the roof. Herrmann, you and me to the top floor and work our way down. Let’s move.”

_Hoses are connected to the hydrants, ladders raised. Casey, Herrmann, Otis and Vargas head inside._

Man: “Over here.”

Casey: “Keep moving.” _Over the radio_ “People coming out.” _To Herrmann_ “Let’s go, Herrmann.”

Over radio: “Second floor is completely yours.”

_Otis checks the elevators, rats are coming down the stairs. Herrmann and Casey head upstairs. Casey busts open the door to the first apartment._

“Fire department! Anyone here?”

_Outside._

Cruz to Mills: “Hey, slow breaths, okay?”

_They head up the ladder._

 

_Back inside with Otis and Vargas._

Otis: “Elevator one is clear!”

Vargas: “Something’s keeping it open.” _Into radio_ “We’ve got an open door on five!”

Otis: “Let’s clear it.” _Into radio_ “Otis AND Vargas heading up to five. Elevator obstruction.”

 

_On the roof with Cruz and Mills_

Cruz: “Gimme a diagonal stripe right here!”

 

_Inside with Casey and Herrmann. Casey busts open another door._

Casey: “Fire department! Anyone here? Call out!”

Children: “Help, Help us.”

_Casey and Herrmann move further into the apartment. Casey searches the child’s bed. Children coughing._

Children: “We’re under here!”

Casey kneels down and reaches under the bed.

Casey: “It’s gonna be alright. We’ll get you out. Come on. Watch your head, sweetie. Come on. I got ya.”

_Herrmann takes the boy, Casey picks up the girl and they carry them out._

 

_Otis and Vargas reach the fifth floor elevator. A woman has collapsed and is stopping the doors from closing._

Otis: “Woman down.”

 

_Back outside with Casey, Herrmann and the kids._

Casey: “Can you walk? All right. Go to this guy. Go to Mouch.” 

Herrmann: “There you go. He’s alright.”

_Mouch takes the kids_

Casey: _Over radio_ “Truck 81, we’re going back in.” _To Herrmann_ “Let’s go.”

 

_Back on the roof with Cruz and Mills, Mills’ saw gets jammed and stops working_

Cruz: “Hey! Use your axe!”

 

_Back inside with Otis and Vargas_

Vargas: “I’ll take her.”

_Vargas takes the woman over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry and they head out_

 

_On the roof_

Cruz: “It’s ready to vent! Back up!” _Over radio_ “Roof is open.”

 

_Inside with Casey and Herrmann_

Herrmann: “It’s too hot! We gotta go now!”

Casey: _Over radio_ “Everybody out! Out! Let ‘em get hoses on it!”

_Casey and Herrmann head out. Outside Boden pulls up to the fire. Mouch goes over to the Chief to catch him up._

Boden: “Rescue squad is two minutes out. Ambo, too. What do you have?”

Mouch: “Cruz and Mills are headed down from the roof. Otis, Vargas, Casey and Herrmann are clear on floor four and headed down.

Boden: “No, no, no. They’ve gotta go up. The smoke’s gone black.” OVER RADIO “Casey, up. Go to the roof. Casey, do you copy? Up! Up! Now! Move! Go! Go! Go!”

 

_Casey and Herrmann come round the corner and head to head with Otis, Vargas and the victim on the stairs. The fire jumps up the walls, a beam falls and before anyone can do anything the floor gives and Herrmann and Casey fall down into the basement._

_Outside squad pulls up to the scene and they all jump out._

Boden: _Into radio_ “Rescue squad on scene.” _To Severide_ “We have at least two not moving in the basement. Casey and Herrmann”

Severide: “We’ll get ‘em.” _Into radio_ “Squad three, moving in.”

Over radio: “Hold engines.”

 

_Squad heads in and Ambo pulls up. Inside Otis see’s squad and calls out to them._

Otis: “Up here! Up here!”

Severide: “Go up!” _Into radio_ “This is Severide! I need a ladder over the west side window, fifth floor. I see Casey and Herrmann.” _To squad_ “Give me a rope! Throw it down!”

_Squad attach’s the ropes the Severide’s harness_

Severide: “Come on, let’s go! Let’s go!”

_Squad lowers him down into the basement_

Severide: “Okay. Down! Down! Lower. Okay, I’m down. Off line.” _To Casey_ “Come on, get up! You don’t wanna miss the Mayor’s visit. You’re cooking down here. Hey! You all right?”

 

_Matt tries to blink the dust and smoke out of his eyes, while trying to get his bearings before his brain kicks in and he remembers Herrmann._

Casey: “Herrmann…  Herrmann!”

Severide: “Turn him! Hey! His air!

_Casey removes Herrmann’s broken mask and Severide rips off his own to place on a gasping Herrmann._

Casey: “Take a breath, Herrmann. Breathe, buddy.”

Severide: “Hey, get me another line down here!”

 

_Outside a helicopter is circling over the chaos of people, vehicles and smoke. Cruz climbs up the aerial to reach Otis and Vargas._

Cruz: “Otis? Need a lift?”

_Otis passes the victim to Cruz_

Otis: “This is the last resident. Building’s clear!”

Cruz: “Got her.”

Otis: “Thanks buddy.”

_Inside with Casey, Herrmann and Severide. Herrmann is being raised out of the basement by squad._

Severide: “Get him up. Watch his head!”

Squad: “Get him up. Let’s go.” 

 

_Squad carry’s Herrmann out. Casey and Severide start looking for something to stand on to help them get out. Severide sees a table and they drag it over and climb on, Severide gives Casey a boost. Matt pulls himself up and leans back over the edge to help Severide up. Matt barely has a grip on his arm when the table gives way. They hold onto to each other, Casey trying to pull him up but slipping closer to the edge every time he moves. Just when Casey thinks he’s going over the edge, Mouch runs in and grabs his legs followed by the rest of Squad 3._

Mouch: “I got you, Lieutenant.”

 

 

_Outside with Shay, Dawson and Herrmann. Shay is stripping off his gear and Dawson checks his heart and lungs with a stethoscope._

Herrmann: “I’m okay.”

Shay: “You’re okay.”

Herrmann: “I’m okay.”

Shay: “You’re gonna be all right.”

Dawson: “That’s right, Herrmann, you’re fine, okay? Tension pneumothorax.”

Shay: “Don’t think, just do it.”

_Dawson decompresses his lung_

Dawson: “All right, stay with me, Christopher. Stay with me. He’s probably got other internal damage. Help me get him inside.”

_The guys help load Herrmann into the rig. Casey, Severide, Mouch and Squad come hustling out of the building._

Severide: _Into radio_ “Clear! Squad 3, Truck 81 are clear!”

Boden: _Into radio_ “Roger. Open up the hoses.”

Casey: “How’s Herrmann?”

Boden: “On his way to lakeshore.”

_Someone hands Casey a bottle of water and he pours half of it over his head, steam rising from him as he walks over to the candidate._

Casey: “Nice work, Candidate.”

Mills: “Thanks.”

Casey: “Now start packing up our gear.”

Capp: “Looks like we’re gonna meet the mayor after all.”

_Two big black SUV’s pull up and the mayor jumps out, heading straight for chief Boden._

 

_Back at the house Casey gets out of the shower and finds Dawson sat in the locker room._

Casey: “I’m going to the hospital to check in on Herrmann, if you want to come.

Dawson: “What do you know?”

Casey: “I know we can’t lose another one.”

_Casey looks over to Darden’s old locker._

 

_Mills goes into Boden’s bunk area._

Boden: “Hell of a first day, Mills. You handled yourself. Rest of the truck will remember that.”

Mills: “Thank you, chief. Uh chief, one other thing. I was talking about the rescue squad and Lieutenant Casey told me not to be a crow. You know what that means?”

Boden: “Oh, did he? A crow wanted to be a peacock, so he put on coloured feathers and went over to the peacock yard, but the peacocks, they plucked them all away. So the crow, he tried to get back with the crows. They wanted nothing to do with him.”

Mills: “My mum used to tell me to keep my mouth shut and just watch. I’m glad I have you here to watch, chief.”

 

_Severide passes by the fridge on his way out, grabbing some more of Casey’s corned beef. There’s a note on the tin foil saying; Casey corned beef. Help yourself. Severide smiles thinking of how grateful his to have Casey back in his life before realising that he nearly lost him again last night. He had to talk to him._

 

_Dawson and Casey walk into the hospital waiting room, most of the house is already there._

Casey: “Any update?”

Cruz: “He’s in surgery, trying to find a bleed. They don’t know.”

Severide: “Hey Casey can I talk to you a sec?”

Casey: “Sure. Hey, someone come get me if there’s an update?”

_Severide leads Casey away from the hospital and around a corner where they have some privacy, out of sight to anyone passing by._

Casey: “What’s up Sev, you okay?”

Severide: “I just wanted to – to say that. What I said at the weekend, I meant it. I really don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t in my life. Last night was a close call and I’m glad you’re okay.”

Casey: “I feel the same way Kelly. That’s why I didn’t drop your ass back into the basement.”

Severide: “I’m serious Matt. I wanna talk about us.”

Casey: “I know where you’re going with this Kelly and we agreed to be friends, it hasn’t even been a week.”

Severide: Matt I wanna talk about this. I think I -”

Casey: “Don’t say it. Kelly don’t say it. You’ve never wanted to talk about this before why are you doing this to me now?”

_Matt had started pacing up and down, not being able to take in what Kelly was saying. Kelly thinks that maybe words aren’t enough so he takes action instead. Grabbing Matt’s arm, spinning him around and kissing him. Putting all the love and emotion he could into that kiss. Matt kisses him back and they both get lost in the moment. When they separate for air, Matt has his back to the wall, one of Kelly’s arms around his waist the other cupping his face. He felt safe in Kelly’s arms even as he felt a tear roll down his cheek._

Severide: “Matt I’m serious. I want you. I think I love you.”

Casey: “I can’t do this Kelly. I can’t.”

Severide: “Please don’t say that baby. Please I need you.”

_Kelly tries to kiss him again but Matt puts his hands on Kelly’s shoulders and gently pushes him away._

Casey: “The first time we had sex and decided to leave it there. I was confused and hung up on it for months. I can’t go through that again and then to see you 24 hours a day, watch you chase after girls. I can’t go through that again Kelly. I just can’t.”

_With that Matt walks away leaving Kelly and going back into the waiting room. Kelly paces up and down, this couldn’t be happening, he finally knows what he wants, what he needs. Matt is the only person he’s ever felt like this about. The only person other than Shay he’d ever said I love you to. This couldn’t be it. He needed Matt._

 

_When Kelly makes it back to the waiting room Matt is sat by himself in the corner, slightly curled in on himself, his eyes a little red around the edges. He takes a seat where he can keep an eye on Matt but isn’t too close to make him uncomfortable. Boden arrives a few minutes later._

Boden: “Anything change?”

Otis: “He’s still in surgery. I called his family, they’re on their way from Wheaton.”

_They all stay until the doc comes out and tells them that Herrmann is stable and out of the woods. Making sure that Cindy has anything she needs before they call it a night. No one could say that they didn’t take care of their own._

 


	10. Quick Question UPDATED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This isn't a chapter just a quick question.

Okay so the next chapter is nearly finished but I got an idea for Casey's past. (to possibly be introduced in later chapters) I want to see what you all think, it's a little dark even though I know we all love hurt Casey. And I like the idea of putting Hank Voight in as a friend. I've seen a few episodes of Chicago PD and the crossover episodes and he really loves and protects the people he cares about.

Sorry the next update is taking a while. Went to London for my birthday, took a few days to recover from it. :)

Would love to hear some opinions.  

 

 

UPDATE: 

Okay so there are some mixed opinions on this which were great to hear. I've decided not to put Voight in this story but you never know I might write him into another story one day or do a CPD CFD crossover one day. 


	11. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback to the day Matt and Kelly graduated from the Fire Academy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There seems to be a fifty-fifty split on Voight being a good guy in this story. I'm gonna hold off on adding him to the story for now and see if it comes naturally but I would definitely recommended that anyone who hasn't watched the crossover episodes between Chicago Fire/ Chicago PD and Law and Order SVU watches them, you really see a different side of Voight.

_“Matt I’m serious, I want you. I think I love you.”_

_“I can’t do this Kelly. I just can’t.”_

_“Please don’t say that baby. Please I need you.”_

 

Matt wakes up with a start, sitting bolt upright, Kelly’s words still ringing in his ears. _“Please I need   you.”_ What the hell was Kelly doing to him? He’d barely gotten any sleep the last few nights, tossing and turning all night and when he finally got to sleep his brain started replaying the conversation with Kelly. Matt runs his fingers over faded bruises on his hips, fingertip bruises from Kelly holding him tight. Holding him so tight and thrusting deep inside him, hitting his prostate, making fireworks explode behind his eyes and making his back arch. Matt stops that thought before it goes any further. Why was Kelly doing this now, he’d never wanted to talk about it before. Matt gets up and jumps in the shower to try and organise his thoughts.

 

In the shower his mind goes back to the day they graduated from the academy. _The ceremony, all the proud families and smiling faces, except him and Kelly didn’t have any family there. Kelly’s mum had checked out when he was 16, his dad was god knows where. Kelly left him a dozen messages but never heard back from him. Matt lost his parents in a freak electrical house fire when he was a kid and his sister was at college on the other side of the country. Neither of them felt alone though, they had each other. They’d had each other since the first day of the academy._

 

Matt gets out of the shower, trying not to think about the past but it was hard not to. He gets dressed and goes to the kitchen to make some breakfast. When the memories come flooding back again.

 

_After all the formalities where over with everyone went to the after-party at a local bar. Matt and Kelly made eyes at each other across the room all night. When the sexual tension finally became too much they snuck out the back and found themselves in the alley. Kelly had him pressed against the wall, hips rolling up against his own. Kelly kissing at every sweet spot on his neck, hands running down his body, squeezing his ass, going down to the backs of his thighs. Kelly squeezes his thighs and he gets the picture, jumping up and wrapping his legs around him, pulling Kelly in even closer. Crashing their lips together in a passionate kiss of tongues and teeth. Kelly runs his hands back up his body and pins his arms above his head, Kelly holding him up with just his hips, being manhandled like that sends a shiver up his spine and his cock straining against the fly of his dress blues. They finally break apart to breathe and Matt says what they’re both thinking. “My apartment is two blocks from here.” Kelly grins at him, kissing him once more before saying. “Race you.” With that Kelly drops him back to the ground and runs out of the alley towards Matt’s place, Matt runs after him, hot on his heels._

 

 

Matt goes for a run and gets to shift early, checking over the gear and doing checks to keep his mind busy. Mills is making breakfast and everyone is hanging out in the common room.

Otis: “Hey, hey check it out!”

Cruz: “Oh, yeah! Best benefit all year boys!”

Capp: “He’s not lying.”

Mouch: “We’re there when you feed us.” Mouch chips in his two cents from the couch as usual. Cruz and Otis walk up to the grill to see what’s for breakfast.

Cruz: “Hey, you know about fire fans, Peter Mills?”

Otis: “They’re chicks who follow firemen like flies to honey.”

Cruz: “Bees, Otis. Bees to honey.”

Otis: “Whatever, we’re still the honey.”

Otis and Cruz carry on their argument as they leave the room, knowing them it could last all day long. Severide comes in to get some breakfast and see’s Casey sat at the table, feeling awkward he grabs an orange and a coffee and heads back out to the squad table.

 

 

Severide thinks on it all morning, things are tense with Casey again. He can’t stand the idea of things being like they used to be, 24 hour shifts were hard enough and now the damn barbecue was coming up and Kelly was dreading it. So he decides to go to the chief to try and get out of it.

“Hey, chief, you got a second?

“Sure Kelly.”

“Looking for a few extra shifts this month. How’s Saturday sound?”

“Saturday’s barbecue.”

“I’ve been before.”

“No way. Everyman on deck on this one.”

“Chief, I could really use the cash…”

“Ask me next month.”

“Okay.”

Accepting that Boden isn’t gonna let him out of it, Kelly goes back to work and tries his best to avoid Matt all day. When third watch rolls in the guys all head out.

 

Otis: “Oh candidate dress blues to the barbeque.”

Mills: “Really?”

Cruz: “The commissioner’s gonna be there, along with half the deputies and most of the chiefs. It’s a big deal.”

Otis: “Yeah, they cracked Herrmann last year for forgetting his cap.”

Cruz: “Go back and read the poster. Full dress blues.”

 

 

Shay had noticed Kelly avoiding Matt on shift, he wasn’t as subtle as he thought he was. When they get back to the apartment she starts in on him.  

“So what’s going on with you and Casey? Things seemed a little frosty on shift.” 

“Shay please don’t start again. We just got in.”

“If I make breakfast, will you talk to me then?”

“What you making?”

“Chocolate chip pancakes.”

“Deal.”

 

Shay makes breakfast, Kelly makes coffee and they sit down at the breakfast bar.

“He flat out rejected me shay, what am I supposed to do and now the damn barbeque. I tried to get out of it but chief wasn’t having it. Do I avoid him, do I make awkward small talk? I don’t know what to do.”  

“Okay calm down we just gotta make a plan.”

“What you talking about?”  

“Well you want him right? You want a relationship with him?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. Then we make a battle plan and you win him over. Did he say anything about why he didn’t want a relationship?”

“He said he couldn’t do it again, that he was confused and hung up on it the first time we broke up and that it would be too hard to see each other 24 hours a day and … and to watch me chase after girls. He just kept saying he couldn’t do it.”

“I’m so sorry Kelly. So we gotta prove to Matt that you’re serious about him and about having a real relationship. So no more chasing girls… but seriously Kelly I know you’ve said you want this and you’re serious about him but if you get what you want and then freak out and break it off. You’ll lose Matt forever and one of you will have to transfer to a different house - because it will be so much worse than when we lost Darden. It will tear the house apart and someone would definitely get hurt or worse.”

“Shay.”

“I’m not finished. Just take a couple of days, sleep on it. Barbecue isn’t till next week. Make sure this is really what you want. And if it is, I’ll help you get your boy.”  

“I’ve already slept on it, I’ve been harbouring a crush and repressed feelings since the academy - but just for you. I’ll take a few more days to think about it.”

“That’s all I ask.”

Shay kisses him on the cheek, puts her dishes in the sink and heads upstairs to her room. A few days pass by and Kelly and Shay draw up a battle plan.

“Kelly! Get your ass down here it’s game time.”

Kelly comes half way down the stairs to see Shay sat on the couch with a bottle of tequila and a notepad.

“There’s no game on tonight.”

“Yeah there is, we are gonna make a game plan to get you your boy. That is if you still want him?”

“Of course I do.” Kelly runs the rest of the way down the stairs and jumps over the back of the couch and Shay hands him the tequila.

“Okay so what’s the plan?”

“Well Casey has doubts so we gotta prove him wrong. No. More. Chasing. Girls. Eyes front soldier. Prove to him that you can be friends without things being awkward, talk to him, you’ve been friends for years. So talk to him like a friend.”

“Okay, okay I can do that. Anything else?”

“Yeah, you gotta tell him.”

“Tell him what?”

“Tell him you’re gonna prove to him that you’re serious.”

“Do I have to?”

“Yes!” Shay smacks him on the back of the head. “It’s part of you proving that you’re serious and willing to make an effort for him. Now, did Casey say anything else?”

“He said I never wanted to talk about this before and why was I doing this now. There’s something else I might have failed to mention.” Shay gives him a glare. “I kissed him.”

“You did what?!”

“Words weren’t getting through to him, I thought that maybe – I don’t know what I thought. This is killing me Shay, every time I see him all I wanna do is kiss him and hold him and -”

“Stop there, I don’t need any more details than that. But I gotta ask, why are you doing this now?”

“We agreed that after the academy we’d stop and we did. I guess I just closed that door off in my head, when we started working in the same house, both of us were passed it and nothing could have happened anyway. It was too unpredictable and we were friends and we worked together. The weekend away, the two of us talking about the old days and Darden, it brought everything back. I hadn’t realised how much I missed him, how much I need him in my life.”

“Wow. You really love him.”

“I really do Shay. I love him.”

“Maybe something you should think about is when Matt starts coming around to the idea of a relationship is talking about what happened when you graduated from the academy. I kinda get the feeling there’s more to it than you’re telling me.

 

 

At the barbeque, Capp, Otis and Cruz are hanging out at a table when Mills walks up in full dress blues.

Capp: “Fabulous!”

Mills: “Howdy!”

Otis: “When’s the parade, candidate?”

Mills: “Ah, that’s a good one.”

Cruz: “You taking collections for the salvation army?”

Mills: “Yeah.”

Capp: “Got ice cream?” 

Mills: “That’s original. That’s really good.”

Girl: “Excuse me are you the captain?”

Otis: “Oh, no, miss. He’s actually the commissioner.”

Mills: “No, no, no, I’m not.”

Otis: “Yeah, yeah, he is. He’s the youngest one in Chicago history.” 

Girl: “Wow.”

Otis: “Go show her where the beer cooler is, commissioner.”

Girl: “I’d like that.”

Mills: “All right. Right this way.”

Cruz: “Wow.”

Otis: “What?”

Cruz: “So you’re his wingman now?”

Otis: “Karma.”

 

 

Shay, her date Corrine, Dawson her date Mike and Severide are sat at another table.

Casey: “Mind if I squeeze in?”

Dawson: “Mh, oh, of course.” 

Shay: “Um, this is Corrine. She just moved here from, um…”

Corrine: “Alabama.”

Casey: “Nice to meet you.”

Mike: “I think I saw the result of some of your work yesterday. The lipstick, the fingernails? That was you guys? Right?”

Shay: “Yeah well, Dawson got her ass squeezed by a drunken English man.”

Corrine: “Ooh.”

Casey: “You gotta quit flirting with your patients.”

Dawson: “So we prettied him up a little.” 

Corrine: “So not something you learn in med school, I take it?”

Shay: “We’re paramedics. So we don’t go to fancy med school. Although.”

Severide: “What?”

Dawson: “Uh, I’ve been taking some pre-med classes.”

Casey: “Really?”

Severide: “That’s great.”

Dawson: “Yeah, I mean, you know it’s a long way off.”

Mike: “Hey, any time you wanna walk a shift with me, say the word.”

Dawson: “That sounds great.”

Mike: “Any time.”

Casey: “Heather’s here.”

Severide: “Let’s go say hello.”

 

 

Severide: “How’s it going Heather?”

Casey: “Good to see you buddy.” Casey leans down to say hi to the boys.

Heather: “I just, it’s hard on Ben and Griffin. They’re afraid the other kids are gonna treat them differently.

Casey goes over to the boys, picks up the little one and carries him over to the other kids playing football. “Come on, squirt, we’re gonna play some football.” The kids all start laughing and playing together, Casey and Severide just stand and watch them.

“That was really nice, what you did. You’re really nice.”

“Kids are stronger than we think.”

“Yeah, don’t I know it.”

“Hey guys.” Dawson greets, walking over to them.

“I’m gonna grab a beer, you guys want one?” Severide asks them.

“I’m good.” They both answer at the same time. Kelly goes to the beer cooler, leaving them to talk.

“So, what’s up with the new doctor?”

“Who? Mike?”

“Yeah.

“Oh. I don’t know. Not much. Just keeping things simple.”

“Good. You deserve to have fun. We all do.”

 

 

Kelly is stood at the beer cooler, trying to find the guts to talk to Matt when a skinny brunette walks over with a smile that Kelly’s seen before. The smile of a girl who wants to hook up with a firefighter just for the thrill of it. Normally Kelly would see her as an easy lay, buy Kelly could hear Shay’s voice in his head “Eyes front soldier.” The truth was though that Kelly wasn’t interested in her anyway.

“Wow, he protects Chicago and serves the beer?”

“For now, sure.”

“I’m Nicki.” Severide pops the cap off a beer and hands it to her. “Thanks.”

“Yeah.”

“How long you been a firefighter?”

“Since the day I was born. Look I gotta run, Nicki.”

 

 

Realizing that he wasn’t interested in that girl at all, Kelly walks over to Matt with a new found resolve. He was ready to have this talk.

“Matt, can we talk for a minute?”

“What do you want now Severide?”

“I just need you to listen, please.”

“I’m listening, you got one minute.”

“Everything I’ve said lately, I’ve meant it.”

“Severide.”

“No don’t talk please just listen. I know you have doubts about this, about us. But I’m gonna prove it to you. I’ve changed, I want you, only you. I’ll do whatever it takes, for as long as it takes to prove it to you.”

“Is that it?”

“For now.” Matt walks away from Kelly and they don’t talk for the rest of the barbecue, but Kelly smiles for the rest of the day, he’d taken the first step. This would happen and Kelly would wait for as long as it took.

 

 

 

_Kelly makes it up to the apartment first, using his key to open the door just as Matt appears behind him. Slamming the door behind them and not bothering to lock it, ripping each other’s clothes off and making out the entire way to the bedroom. Both of them fall back onto the bed, stripped down to their boxers. Kelly laying on top off Matt, he slows down and starts taking his time, kissing at every sweet spot on Matt’s neck and chest._

_“Kelly. Kelly, I need you.”_

_“I got you baby boy.” Kelly reaches down and palms Matt’s hard cock over his boxers._

_“Kelly I want you inside me.” Kelly stops what he’s doing and looks Matt in the eyes._

_“Are you sure? We haven’t done that before.”_

_“I’m sure. I trust you Kelly.”_

_Kelly reaches over to the bedside table to get the lube and a condom._

_“Matt have you ever done this before, with anyone?”  
“No.” _

_“I’ll be gentle. I promise.” Kelly leans down and kisses him sweetly. They both take off their boxers. Kelly squeezes some lube onto his fingers, circling Matt’s hole with a fingertip, while kissing matt to try to distract him from the initial burn. Matt gasps at the strange feeling trying to relax and get used to it. Kelly works one finger in letting Matt get used to the feeling before searching for his prostate. When he finds it matt arches his back and moans out._

_“What the hell was that?”_

_“I did a little reading. You like it?”_

_“Do it again.” Kelly does it again, works another finger in and starts scissoring them. When he finally gets a third finger in Matt is a sweating, moaning mess._

_“Kelly_. I’m ready, come on. I need you.” Kelly gives him a deep kiss.

_“I got you. I got you baby.” Kelly leans down and gives him a long deep kiss. Kelly rolls on a condom, adding lube to his cock and some more to Matt’s hole. Kelly lines himself up and Matt wraps a leg around his waist, bending his knee and planting the other foot on the bed. Kelly pushes in as slow as he can, when all he wants to do is plunge into that tight heat._

_Kelly sets a rhythm trying but missing Matt’s prostate, he shifts the angle to lean down and kiss him when Matt groans and his eyes roll back in his head. “There it is.” Matt meets every thrust and all too soon Kelly feels that tight heat in his belly and knows he’s close so he reaches for Matt’s cock wanting him to come first._

_“Ah – k-Kelly I- I’m g-gonna.” Matt comes over both their stomachs, his ass rhythmically tightening around Kelly’s cock pushes him over the edge. Thrust becoming uneven and jerky before collapsing on top of Matt._

_“Holy Shit.”_

_“Damn that was good. Your ass is so tight.”_

_“Thanks. Get off me, I can’t breathe.”_

_“Sorry.” Kelly gets rid of the condom and grabs a washcloth to clean them both off. Crawling in next to Matt and falling asleep._

_Matt wakes up to an empty bed, going into the kitchen to see if Kelly made coffee. He finds a note instead._

**_I had fun last night Matt. We start at our new houses tomorrow,_ **

**_I don’t think we should keep doing this. I hope we can stay friends,_ **

**_you’re important to me and I hope we work together sometime. Kelly. Xx_ **

_Kelly left his key next to the note._


	12. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter. Whoop whoop. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanna say a quick thank you to everyone who's read, kudos and commented on this. I started writing as a way to help with my anxiety and it took me a long time to get the nerve to post on here but you guys have all been so great and I never expected the response I got. So thank you everyone. The rainbow coloured world of fanfiction is always so supportive. :D :) :D :) :D :)

Otis is stood staring at truck 81’s crest, Cruz comes to stand beside him trying to figure what Otis is staring so intently at.

“What’s with the goat?”

“What?”

“The truck 81 seal, or symbol, or whatever it’s called, it’s a goat.”

“It’s a fighting goat.”

“Yeah, but they’ve got Cerberus, the three-headed dog that guards the gates of hell. We got a friggin’ goat.” Otis walks away in a huff.

 

 

Later in the day when they’re all relaxing around the station the bells go off.

Dispatch: “Jumper, squad 3, truck 81, ambulance 61, battalion 25.”

 

Rolling up to the scene Dawson and Shay jump out, grabbing the gurney, oxygen, jump bag and monitor. A cop waves them over and shows them to the victim.

 

Dawson: “Still alive?”

Cop: “Yeah, but if he wanted to be dead before, I guarantee he wants it now.”

Mills: “How high?”

Cop: “Fourth floor.”

Shay: “I’ll call ahead to Med. Have ‘em prep for a spinal trauma, multiple broken bones.”

Cop: “It’s not like that.”

Herrmann: “Holy smokes.” Even with Herrmann’s experience this was a new one for him.

 

The victim is impaled on a fence through his right arm and shoulder, shaking and sweating from the shock, taking shallow, shuddering breaths. Casey and Mills take the victims weight to prevent further injury. Shay leans over them to check the victims pulse. As squad three and the chief roll up to the scene.

 

Shay: “We got a pulse.”

Casey: “We need two ladders and a rope bag.”

Dawson: “You pull him off, he bleeds out right here, right now.”

Casey: “Chief?” Casey looks over to the chief for what he wants to do. Chief surveys the scene and directs his men to the new plan with the help of Dawson’s advice.

Chief: “Get the K-12. We’re cutting him down.”

 

Dawson gets the monitor ready and Vargas covers the victim with his turnout coat to protect him as Severide gets into position behind the victim to cut through the steel fence.

Chief: “Pump some water on that steel so it doesn’t overheat!”

Dawson: “He’s gonna arrest.” Dawson warns them.

Severide: “Talk to the saw, not me.”

Mills: “You’ll be alright, just try and stand still!” Mills makes and effort to keep the guy calm.

Shay: “He can’t hear you! He’s in shock!”

Severide: “Hold that.” Severide gets Mills to hold the side of the fence he’d cut through.

 

Severide. “All right, get ready. He’s coming down.”

Vargas: “Three, two, one. Everybody good.”

All: “Yeah.”

Vargas: “Watch his head.”

Cruz: “Got it, got it, got it.”

 

Shay: “Hey, whoa.” Shay stops everyone pushing the gurney towards the rig.

Dawson: “He’s going into v-fib. We gotta pull the fence.”

Herrmann: “What happened to ‘we pull it he dies’?”

Dawson: “We gotta get his heart back on rhythm, but there’s no way I’m shocking him till we get this iron out first.”

Casey: “Severide!”

Severide: “Yo!”

Casey calls him and he comes running over. Severide brings a smaller saw and Hadley holds the metal plate under the railing to protect the victim and stop the saw Kelly was using.

 

 

Severide gets to work cutting through the fence, when he’s done Shay calls the order to pull the fence.

Shay: “Ready, pull!” They pull the fence in one smooth motion then Shay calls the count to roll him over onto his back. “One, two, three!” Dawson quickly pulls out the pads and places them on his chest.

Dawson: “Okay, here we go. Shocking at two, stand by. Clear. Hitting him again at 360. Stand by. Clear. Rhythm.”

Shay: “He’s got a pulse. Okay get him in.”

The second the victim has a steady pulse they load and go to Chicago Med. Rolling in a doctor joins them and Dawson downloads her on the man’s condition.

 

Dawson: “Suicide attempt. Fell from four stories, impaled on a fence.”

Doc: “You removed it on scene?”

Dawson: “He went into V-fib. Had to yank. Two shocks on the monitor brought him back.”

Doc: “Let’s get him into one.”

 

 

When everyone gets back to the house Casey heads straight for the coffee machine. He still wasn’t sleeping great, too busy thinking about Kelly and their mess of a friendship. Casey is sitting at the table with his coffee when Otis asks him a question.

“Hey, lieutenant, why do we have a goat on our truck?”

“Years ago, truck 81’s first fire was at a goat farm in little Italy.”

“Really?”

“Mm-hmm.” Casey confirms.

“Nah. They used to have a goat at the station so they didn’t have to mow the grass.” Mouch throws in from his usual spot on the couch.

“Huh. I thought that’s what candidates are for.” Otis jokes, looking at their candidate before busting out laughing.

 

Casey is on his second cup of coffee when another firefighter comes over the PA system.

“Smoke-eater in the house.”

They all run out to the apparatus floor to see Herrmann. All the firefighters excited and cheering, bouncing around like puppies, Herrmann really was the heart of 51.

 

“Hey, Herrmann! Welcome back.” Otis greets him but Herrmann is limping and using a cane, worry flashes across Otis’ face. "Jesus, man.”

“They ticked a nerve in my leg. I might not walk straight again.”

“Candidate, get him a chair!” Vargas orders.

“Thanks, kid. Ah, whoa, whoa, wait a second fellas, are any of my kids around here? My wife or her parents?”

“No, Why?” Otis asks confused by the question.

“What the hell?” Herrmann starts flexing his leg while sat in the chair then he jumps up and starts dancing around, waving his arms and exclaiming.  “I’m healed! Oh, I’m healed! It must have been living with my damn in-laws that was breaking me down!” Otis is all smiles now hugging/tackling Herrmann who lets out a groan. “Ah! All right, I’m not that healed.”

“You ready to get back?” Asks 81’s lieutenant.

“Yeah I am.”

 

The chief walks out to the apparatus floor with a young woman who looks familiar to Kelly. She was the one who came onto him at the barbecue.

“Glad you’re back, Herrmann. We’re a better house with you here.”

“Thanks, chief.”

 

“On another note, this is Nicki Rutkowski.” Chief introduces.

“He-llo.” Cruz all but wolf-whistles. 

“She’s going to be working with us the next month, helping out with the payroll. Her father is one of my oldest friends. We were in the Navy together, so you all just treat her like she’s your very own – sister.” He aims the last part at Cruz and some of the other guys with slack jaws.

“Welcome. Don’t screw up the checks. The first and the fifteenth.” Herrmann jokes.

“Oh, I will.”  She jokes back at him, at least she has a good sense of humour, Kelly thought, maybe things won’t be awkward between them. She was a complication Kelly didn’t have time for. The bells go off, damn Herrmann missed that sound.

 

Dispatch: “Accident, multiple injuries, squad 3, truck 81, engine 51, ambulance 61, battalion 25”

“Herrmann stick around, we’ll be back soon.” Casey shouts back as he heads for the truck.

“Will do lieutenant.”

 

The accident takes a few hours to wrap up, when they all get back Herrmann’s still there, Cindy and the kids have joined him too.

Herrmann: “Dawson, Shay! Get over here. We got something for you. Come on, let’s go. Bring it out, open it up.”

Shay: “Whoa. Wow.”

Herrmann: “They obviously got their artistic talent from their mother.”

Shay: “That’s so lovely!”

Cindy hugs both Shay and Dawson. Everyone on the app floor clapping and cheering.

Herrmann: “Hey, you guys, these are the ladies that saved my life. Come on, give ‘em a clap.”

Shay: “Yeah! Thank you guys.”

Dawson: “Thank you.”

 

Herrmann stays and hangs out with everyone for a while and Otis brings up the goat – again.

“All I’m saying is, I’m more than happy to design a new seal more reflective of the truck we are. Anything besides a goat.”

“What’s he on about?” Herrmann asks Casey.

“He doesn’t like our crest.”

“I love that goat. That goat’s all about reversing the curse.”

“What curse?” Mills asks.

“The cubs. A goat owner cursed ‘em once, which is why they always suck. Everyone knows that.”

“So we have a cursed crest?” Otis asks.

“How the hell should I know? Leave it alone. The goat rocks!”

“Of course you would think that.” Otis gives up.

 

In the morning before Kelly heads home, he goes to the chief’s office to drop off some paperwork.

“He in?”

“On the phone. You can leave it with me though. Hey, um tomorrow night, I don’t know if you have plans, but me and some girlfriends are going to see Kaskade at the Vic if you’re interested.” Nicki was getting more obvious every time she flirted with him.

“What’s Kaskade?”

“Oh, he’s a DJ. A famous one.”

“Yeah, um look, I know I have a reputation. But I need you to meet me halfway here, and respect Boden and your dad’s wishes.”

 

 

Kelly and Shay are having lunch and a few beers while watching the Cubs game. When there’s a knock at the door.

“I’ll get it.” Kelly opens the door to find Nicki, wearing tiny shorts, a CFD t-shirt tied up into a knot and holding his jacket. Damn this girl was desperate.

“You, um, you left your jacket. At the station.”

“Thanks.” She keeps a tight hold on his jacket trying to pull him in for a kiss but Kelly turns his head away. “Mm. Not a good time for this.”

“Do you always do what your chief tells you to do?”

“Trust me, this isn’t because of the chief.”

“Is there somebody else in there?”

“Just the Cubs.”

“If you change your mind, you know where to find me.”

 

Severide goes back into the apartment, grabbing another beer for him and Shay.

“Who was that?”

“That Nicki girl, from the station.”

“What did she want?”

“I left my jacket at the house, she dropped it off.”

“That’s weird.”

“Yeah, she came onto me pretty strong yesterday and at the barbeque. She’s not so subtle.”

“You told her to back off right?”

“Yeah. I told you, I’m all in with Matt.”

“I’m just checking, but Kelly I am proud of you.”

“Why? Because I turned down a fire fan.”

“No you fool. I’m proud of you for actually facing your feelings for once. You’re going after the thing you want most, even if it means you get hurt. That isn’t easy. Do you think I should talk to Casey?”

“No Shay! You told me to tell him and let him come to me. That’s what I’m doing, I know Matt if you push him, he’ll pull away.”

“You two are so made for each other. On another note, it was good seeing Heather the other day.”

“Yeah. Yeah, it was.”

“Did she say how the boys are doing?”

“They’re doing okay, given the circumstances. It’s not easy but they’ll get there.”

“Maybe we should doing something nice for them. You know take them all out, go bowling, grab dinner. We could invite Matt too.”

“Yeah that sounds good.”

 

 

Dawson and Shay are driving around in the ambo after grabbing lunch when Shay spots a familiar face.

“There’s Willie, our favourite doorman! Willie!”

“Hey! Willie!”

“I should flash him next time. Love that guy.”

“Unprofessional.”

Dispatch: “Ambulance 61, battery, 71 west superior.”

 

“Ambulance 61, responding.” Shay tells dispatch and Dawson hits the lights and sirens. Trying to finish her sandwich before they get there.

 

Back at the firehouse after the ambo call, Shay searches for Matt, finding him in his office.

“Casey you got a sec?”

“Sure, what’s up Shay?” She comes in and closes the door.

“I know what’s been going on with you and Kelly lately.”

“Shay listen -”

“Oh my god what is it with you two? Let me finish a damn sentence will you.”

“Sorry. Go on.”

“Listen, Kelly told me a little about what happened at the academy. He didn’t tell me how it ended. I get the feeling there is more than he’s telling me and I imagine I will have the urge to smack him when I find out.”

“Probably yeah.”

“I know Kelly doesn’t have the best track record with relationships, none of us do really, but I’ve seen the way he talks about you and looks at you. He really does love you matt and I seriously think he’s gonna do whatever it takes to prove it to you. I know you find it hard to trust people, but so does Kelly, so do I. I just want you to think about this. And I want you to know that you can talk to me too. I know we’ve kinda drifted a little lately, but I’m still your friend Matt and I’m here.”

“Things didn’t end well between us and it took a long time for me to move past it. Shay, I just don’t know if I can put myself through that again.”

“I understand Matt, I’ve been there myself and I got my heart broken. But if you don’t take the risk, you’ll never know.”

Cruz knocks and sticks his head in the office. “Hey, Chief wants us all on the app floor. Meeting.”

“If you wanna talk more I’m here Matt.” Shay kisses him on the forehead and they go to the meeting.

 

Meanwhile. Nicki walks up to the squad table to give Severide a package.

“Hey, this came for you earlier.”

“Thanks.”

Severide opens it to find her underwear. Damn it, he was actually gonna have to talk to her, this was getting ridiculous. Boden comes out onto the app floor with some of truck. “Cruz, go round up Casey and anyone else we’re missing. I wanna have a little meeting.” “Sure thing, chief.”

 

Casey, Shay and a few stragglers join them and the Chief goes over a few standard things plus some upcoming events, before wrapping up.

 

“So if there is nothing else?”

“Chief?” Otis gets his attention.

“Yes, Brian?”

“I was wondering what the proper protocol would be for designing a new crest for the truck. It’s just, sir, engine’s got a camel, which I get. And squad has got a badass three-headed dog, which I get. And we have a goat, sir.”

“Named after Billy “goat” Bukanski. First chief of firehouse 51 and a mentor to me.”

“Just forget I said anything.” Otis takes a step back and Vargas hits upside the back of the head.

“That it?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Then you all do good work out there.” They all go their separate ways from the informal meeting. Casey follows after the chief. “That true about the crest?” Chief scoffs and starts laughing, Casey can’t help but join in, his mood lifting for the first time that week.

 

 

Casey spends most of the day thinking about what Shay said to him, staring into his now cold cup of coffee. Maybe talking to Kelly wasn’t a bad idea, right? I mean a conversation couldn’t hurt could it, even if he had no idea what he wanted to say to him. Casey gets up to find Severide, checking at the squad table first. He sees Kelly guiding that skinny bitch Nicki into the change out room.

“Son of a bitch. I knew it. Some things don’t change, Kelly.” He says under his breath, storming off to his office.

 

Inside the change out room, Nicki walks straight over to Severide’s gear and picks up his helmet, turning around to put it on him.

 

“Evites are so impersonal. Leave it on.”

“Girl, you are barking up the wrong tree.”

“Yeah?

“Listen you gotta stop this. I’m not interested.”

“Then, prove it.”

Kelly hands her back the packet with her underwear in, puts his helmet back on the shelf and walks out. Leaving a stunned and embarrassed Nicki. Kelly is going to his office when Shay grabs him.

“Hey! I need to talk to you.”

“That girl is in serious heat, and I’m not Ghandi.”

“What? No, about Casey.”

“Oh.”

“I talked to him.”

“Shay! I told you not to.”

“I know, but I did. I just thought you should know it went well.”

“Damn it woman you’re gonna be the death of me.”

“Yet, you still love me.”

“You know it.”

 

Kelly, still going to his office. When he spots Matt in his own office and decides to talk to him instead of doing paperwork.

“Hey there lieutenant, you got a minute?”

“Not for you.”

“What? I thought we were okay?”

“And I thought that everything you’ve been saying lately was bull and I guess I was right.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I saw you take Nicki into the change out room.”

“That wasn’t anything. Well it wasn’t what you’re thinking.”

“Yeah right. How stupid do you think I am?”

Dispatch: Truck 81, engine 51, ambulance 61.

“Saved by the bell Severide.”

Matt goes to leave and Kelly grabs his arm. “We’re not done talking about this Matt.”

Matt pulls his arm back out of Kelly’s grip. “Yeah, we are. Severide.”  Matt spits out his name like it was a bad taste in his mouth.

 

The call is quick, just a minor car accident, the patient refuses treatment only having a sprained wrist. So they clean up the scene and head back to the house. Casey spends the rest of shift ignoring Severide and shooting him a death glare every time he gets too close or looks like he’s gonna talk to him.

 

 

The next night everyone is at Molly’s, Matt is drunk, drunk by the time Kelly gets there.

“Severide! There you are. Beer?” Herrmann greats him as he comes in. He puts a beer in front of him and Kelly takes a long pull. “Thanks Herrmann.” There’s something loud going on at the end of the bar, where Matt and some of the guys are sat. Kelly looks over and sees Matt, Capp and Cruz having a competition to see who can chug a beer the fastest.

“Drink, drink, drink!” The others chant, Casey wins and they all cheer and he takes another shot, the third one Kelly’s seen him take since he walked in two minutes ago.  

“Herrmann, another round of drinks. On me!” Casey yells, slurring drunkenly.

“Whoa. How many has he had?” Kelly asks Herrmann.

“That I’ve served him? Four.”

Herrmann walks down the bar to Casey. “Hey lieutenant. I think maybe you’ve had enough.”

“Come one Herrmann what you talking about. A round of drinks, that’s an order.” Matt laughs, nearly falling off his stool, damn he was drunk.

“Casey, he’s right I think you’ve had enough.” Kelly says, standing behind Matt and putting a hand on his shoulder to steady him.  

“What is this come on I’m fine. Just having a drink with my guys.”

“I'm your friend, and I'm telling you I think you had too much to drink.” Herrmann calmly tries to convince him.

“Come on Casey, let me find you a cab.” Kelly tries again.

“That's funny. That's really funny. You deciding what’s best for me.” Casey says to him, venom in his words.

“Come on, Casey.” Herrmann pushes.

“Are you guys kidding? I’m not even driving tonight. Just serve the drinks.”

“No, no, come on. It's just your buddies wanting to make sure you get home safe.” Herrmann comes to the other side of the bar with Kelly as they try to usher him out the door.

“Come on, Matty, let's go. Outside.” Kelly wraps his arm around Matt’s waist and pulls Matt’s arm over his shoulder, steadying him and taking most of his weight. Herrmann grabs the door and helps him drag Matt out.

“I’ll find him a cab.” Herrmann offers.

“It’s alright man, I’ve got my car. I’ll drive him.”

“Probably a good idea. See you next shift man.” Herrmann pats Severide on the shoulder and heads back inside.

 

“Come on Matty, let’s get you home.”

“Get off me, Kelly.” Kelly lets him go and watches him stumble before grabbing him again. “Seriously Matt what’s going on with you? You don’t drink like this. Just let me help you get home.”

“You wanna take me home? Thought you’d rather be with your skinny little slut?”

“Matt I just wanna get you home safe. Now get into the car!” Matt gives in and gets in the car, pouting like a toddler. “In you get. Watch your head.”

 

 

Matt falls asleep on the drive to his apartment, Kelly parks the car and goes round the other side to help Matt out. Getting him up the steps to his place proves difficult with Matt swaying all over the place. When they get inside, Kelly is trying to guide him to the bedroom when Matt suddenly kisses him. Kelly can’t help but kiss him back before his conscious gets the best of him.

“Not like this Matty, you’re drunk, you’d regret it in the morning.”

Matt pulls away and slaps him across the face. “Fuck you!” Everything Matt had been holding in was finally coming out, his walls lowered in his drunken state.

“I might love you, I’m not sure anymore but how the hell am I supposed to trust you? I loved you, I gave you everything I had and you left me with a note? A note?!” Matt was yelling at him by now, his anger seeming to sober him up. “You were a cowardly bastard, you couldn’t even look me in the eye. You left me in the night, you broke my heart and we never talked about it again. Then we were friends, good friends and now you wanna drag this up again. So what, so that you can fuck me and leave me again? Is that what you want? Because if it is then just fuck me and get out!”

 

“Matt! That isn’t what I want, I love you! I want you! I want a real relationship, I want to kiss you and hold you, make love to you, celebrate birthdays and Christmas’s and anniversary’s I want to be with you forever!” Kelly was yelling back at him, trying to get through to the belligerent drunk.

“Then what happened with Nicki?”

“She came onto me I didn’t wanna make a scene in front of the guys. You know what those assholes can be like so I took her into the change out room and told her to back the hell off.”

“Really? You’re not lying to me are you?”

“Really, really. I promise you, now you need some sleep. You’re gonna have one hell of a headache in the morning.” They had moved closer to each other now, Kelly’s arms around his waist and not to hold him up this time. Kelly helps him get changed and into bed, he goes to leave but Matt keeps tight hold of his hand.

“While I’m drunk enough to ask, will you stay with me a while?”

“Of course, just let me grab you a glass of water and some ibuprofen for the morning.” Kelly kisses him on the forehead and goes to the kitchen to get water and pills, also shooting Shay a text to say he won’t be home tonight. When he gets back to the room Matt is passed out, so Kelly crawls in behind him and falls asleep.  

 

 

Matt wakes up with a throbbing headache, there was way too much light coming through the curtains for his liking. He spots a glass of water and two pills on the bedside table, inwardly thanking whoever got him home in one piece. He sits up and take the pills before the memory of last night comes rushing back to him. “Oh God.” Matt spots a note next to the glass of water.

**Went to the store to get some stuff for breakfast.**

**Be back soon.**

**Kelly, Xx**

 

Matt drinks the whole glass of water, feeling dehydrated and mouth drier than cotton wool. Hearing the front door open and close before Kelly walks into his bedroom.

“Morning.” Casey isn’t sure what else to say.

“Morning, sleepy head. How you feeling?”

“Little rough.”

“I bet.”

“At least I woke up to a better note than the last time.”

“I didn’t want you to think I bailed again. How much of last night do you remember?”

“All of it. I think.”

“Well why don’t you have a shower and brush your teeth while I make breakfast. Your breath stinks from here.”

“That’s a good idea.” Matt drags himself out of bed and into the shower.


	13. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Pall for still being there, sorry you had to wait so long for this. Hope you all enjoy. :)

Matt gets out of the shower and throws on some sweatpants before heading to the kitchen. Sitting at the breakfast bar and watching Kelly cook.

“Feel better?” Kelly asks.

“Much better.” Kelly puts another large glass of water in front of him. “What you making?”

“Eggs, bacon, toast and coffee.” He answers putting a large plate of food in front of Matt.

“Smells good.”

They both dig in and Kelly decides bring up the elephant in the room. “Do you want to talk about last night or forget it ever happened?”

“I guess we could talk about it, if - if you want to?” Matt answers unsure if he’s ready to talk about it.

“I want to talk about it.” Kelly was certain of that, taking a deep breath before asking. “Matt do you trust me?”

“At work 100%, as a friend, yes…”

“But not in a relationship.” Kelly says what Matt can’t and it’s not a question.

“I’m not sure. I want to know, what happened? That night. Why did you run off? Why did you leave me that note?”

“I got scared. I woke up early that morning - I was just watching you sleep and everything felt so perfect, I felt myself falling in love with you and I – I got scared. It terrified me, so I bolted and I regretted it almost as soon as I did it. I didn’t exactly have any role models or experience of good relationships growing up. I didn’t know what to do. I knew we weren’t going to be seeing each other every day after that so I ended it before it blew up.”

“I guess I understand that. I was scared too. I was already in love with you, but I stayed.”

“I know and there’s nothing I can do to change what I did. But I’m here now and if you’ll have me, I’m ready to prove that.”

“It was still a shitty thing to do.”

They both burst out laughing. Finishing their breakfast, talking and laughing, when they’re putting the dishes in the sink, Matt asks.

“So nothing happened with Nicki?”

“She came onto me. Hard. But no, nothing happened. I swear on my honour.” Matt gives him a look that just says ‘really?’ “Fair enough. I swear on my badge.”

“Okay. I believe you.”

“I’m really sorry that Shay butted in by the way. What did she even say to you?”

“That she knew what happened at the academy, but not how it ended. She also mentioned if she found out, she’d probably have the urge to smack you.”

“Oh, yeah, no she would.”

“Definitely.”

“She, say anything else?” Kelly asks nervously.

“That you don’t have the best track record with relationships, but none of us do.” Matt moves into Kelly’s personal space. Putting his arms around his waist, Kelly mirroring his movements. “She said you love me, she could tell from the way you talk about me and the way you look at me.” Their faces inches apart. “We all have trust issues but if you don’t try, you never know.” Matt closes the gap, placing a chaste kiss on Kelly’s lips. “I think… I want to know.”

 

They start kissing in the kitchen and end up making out on the couch. After a while Matt moves to straddle Kelly. Kissing his neck and whispering his ear.

“You know that night we had at the hotel?”

“Yeah.” Kelly answers breathlessly.

“I’d forgotten how much you love to mark your territory. You left bruises on my hips.” Kelly tightens his hold on Matt’s hips at the memory. “On my thighs, you left a hickey on my chest and I could feel you inside me for days.” Matt grinds his hips down in circles on Kelly’s erection.

“Matt.” Kelly groans out his name and Matt just keeps moving his hips, crashing their mouths together again, tongues moving in a familiar dance of give and take. “God Matt, we got to stop.”

“Why?” Matt’s kissing his neck again, testing Kelly’s willpower. Kelly’s brain finally kicks in and he lifts Matt off of him and back onto the couch.

“No. Matt this isn’t right.”

“What’s wrong?” Matt asks worried that Kelly changed his mind.

“I want us to hold off on sex.”

“Seriously?” Matt asks disbelieving but Kelly doesn’t flinch, holding firm on what he said. “Who are you and what have you done with Kelly Severide?”

They share a laugh before Kelly explains. “That’s my point. I always do sex first and relationships don’t go far on just that. I want to prove to you and myself how serious I am about you.”

“Okay that sounds good.” Matt answers tentatively, willing the blood to return to his brain. “But can that start in like 10 minutes.”

Kelly laughs, feeling Matt’s still hard cock against his leg. “How about I help you out with that?” He smirks, pulling Matt’s sweatpants down and taking his cock into his mouth. Matt gasps and throws his head back, overwhelmed by the wet heat of Kelly’s mouth. Kelly doesn’t waste anytime taking Matt in as deep as he can, wrapping his fingers around what won’t fit in his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and bobbing his head. Matt’s calling out his name and running his fingers through Kelly’s hair, gripping a little too tight as he gets closer and closer to coming.

“Kelly! Kelly, I – I – I’m gonna…”

Kelly understands the warning, but he doesn’t care, swirling his tongue around the sensitive head of Matt’s cock. Matt nearly pulls a chunk Kelly’s of hair out as he comes in his mouth. Kelly swallows Matt’s cum before kissing his way up his chest, to kiss him properly. Matt can taste himself on Kelly’s tongue, the kiss is messy but perfect. Matt pulls away first, needing to catch his breath.

 

“Damn that was good. You seriously don’t want to do that every day?”

“At least not for a little while.” Kelly kisses him sweetly.

 

 

Matt and Kelly start a steady relationship. Spending most nights hanging out with Shay and staying at their apartment, sharing a bed but nothing happening, which they were both starting to find hard. (Pun intended.) Before anyone knew it the one year anniversary of Darden’s death was coming up.

Shay, Matt and Kelly had come up with a plan to take Heather and the boys out for some fun, to keep their minds off the events of last year. They all go bowling, the kids having a great time, all of them joking and laughing, even Heather and she had been reluctant to come out with them. Shay reminded her that it would be good for the boys. After they go for pizza and just when Heather was about to take the kids home the three friends hustle everyone into a cab. Pulling up at Molly’s, Heather is confused but goes in with them.

“What’s going on? The kids are a little young for a bar.” She jokes.

“Don’t worry its family night.” Kelly hints before they all go inside.

Everyone from 51 is there as well as Heather and Andy’s family and friends. They all cheer as the guests of honour arrive.

“What’s all this?” Heather asks in shock and awe.

“We’re celebrating, in honour of Andy.” Kelly explains.

“You guys this is so sweet.” She hugs Shay, Kelly and Matt.

 

Everyone is drinking and dancing when Matt stands up on a chair and clinks his glass to get everyone’s attention.

“All right everyone. We’re here to mark a year since we lost Darden. A great firefighter, a great friend, father, son and brother. A good man. He won’t be forgotten. Heather, Griffin, Ben, I hope you all know that you’re family and we will always be here for you, whatever you need.”

The entire bar starts clapping, cheering, whistling and making a lot of noise to agree with what Casey had said. Matt gets down from the chair and ends up with an armful of sobbing Heather.

“That was so sweet Matt. Thank you.”

“I meant every word. 51 will always be here for you and the boys.”

“I know. I appreciate it, I really do.”

 

“Well said lieutenant.” Herrmann comes up to Matt with a beer. “On the house.”

“Thanks Herrmann and thanks for putting this on tonight.”

“We’re family. It’s what we do.”

“True that.” They clink the necks of their beers and take a drink.

 

A little while later and the boys are asleep in the corner of Molly’s, Heather goes up to Matt, Kelly and Shay. “Thanks for a great day guys, but I got to get the boys home.”

“I’ll find you a cab.” Shay offers heading outside.

“We can carry the boys.” Kelly volunteers himself and Matt.  

Shay flags down a cab, Matt and Kelly carrying the boys out and putting them in the backseat. They all give Heather one final hug and watch them drive away.

“I’m going back inside.” Shay says, shivering exaggeratedly before disappearing back inside. 

Kelly stands in front of Matt, wrapping his arms around his waist and holding him tight.

 

“What you said was beautiful. You’re an amazing lieutenant.”

“Thanks Kelly, you want to get out of here?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”  

 

The cab ride home is quiet, Matt leans against Kelly as they hold hands and watch the city lights go by, both men tired from a long, emotional day and just enough beer to not be hungover in the morning. Matt is quiet when they finally get home. A little too quiet. Kelly takes his hand and turns him around to look in his eyes.

“Are you okay baby?”

“Yeah. I was just thinking about that day. I nearly lost you too and then we would never have had this again.” Matt says lifting their joined hands. “Promise me something Kelly?”

“Anything.”

“Promise me that we’ll never waste that much time fighting or hiding our feelings ever again. I love you Kelly. I don’t think I can lose you again.”

“I promise Matty. I love you too and I’m not going anywhere.” Kelly draws Matt into a hug and seals his promise with a kiss.

“I gonna take a shower before bed.” Matt sighs.  

“You want some company?” Kelly offers suggestively.

“I thought we were still on your crazy no sex kick? I’m telling you now, if I’ve got you naked in the shower. I’m not keeping my hands to myself.”

“Maybe we can bend the rules a little.”

“Race you.” Matt says, just like old times before racing off towards the shower.

 

In the shower things start slower than Matt thought they would, he hadn’t realised how much he missed looking at and touching Kelly’s body. They soap each other up and make out under the hot water before Kelly backs Matt up to the wall and starts kissing his neck and chest running his hands up and down his arms and torso but not going any lower.

“Kelly. Seriously it’s been so long I could come from this so if you’re gonna do something. Do it.”

“I got you baby. I got you.”

Taking Matt’s hard cock in his hand, stroking from base to tip in firm steady motions. Matt tips his head back and moans.

“God, this shouldn’t be as good as it is. Kelly you’re killing me with no sex. I miss you, I need your body, your cock inside me.” Matt is grabbing at Kelly and pulling him as close as he can.

“Shhh, Matt just feel. Feel me here with you now. My hand, my body, my lips.” For emphasis Kelly starts kissing his neck again and nipping at the sweet spot on his collar bone. Matt moans at Kelly’s words, he’d been holding out on him so long and Matt was seriously horny, he felt like he was 18 again. Knowing neither of them would last much longer Kelly takes both their cocks in his hand jerks them to completion.

They stay in the shower a little while longer just kissing and touching each other, neither man wanting the moment to end. Lying in bed that night, Kelly couldn’t remember ever feeling so happy with his life.


	14. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I disappeared again but this took a minute to finish. Smut is such a bitch to write. Plus side this could be my longest chapter yet nearly split it into two but I figured I owed you guys one. Hope you enjoy. 
> 
> Fair warning serious smut at the end of this chapter be careful where you read it.

Matt wakes up feeling Kelly’s warm body pressed up against his back and his arms wrapped around him. He couldn’t think of another time in his life he’d felt so safe. Trying to get up for a pee without disturbing Kelly proved difficult. As soon as he tried to sit up Kelly wrapped his arms tighter around his waist, pulling him back into bed and into his strong chest.

Matt tried to loosen his arms but Kelly held onto him like a koala in a tree. After several minutes of this Matt felt Kelly’s chest start to shake and could hear choked off laughter behind him.

“You bastard, how long have you been awake?”

Kelly breaks into a full laugh now. “Only a minute. Sorry it was funny.”

“Yeah well it won’t be funny when I pee on you. Let me up.”

“Ohhh kinky but maybe another day.” Kelly jokes finally releasing Matt.

“You’re such a child.” Matt says smiling as he hits Kelly with a pillow.

 

Matt comes back to the bedroom with two cups of coffee and his toothbrush sticking out of his mouth.

“No, no. What are you doing come back to bed.” Kelly whines after taking a mouthful of coffee.

“I can’t, I gotta go to work.” Matt says around a mouthful of toothpaste.

“Call in sick and stay in bed with me all day.” Kelly reasons.

Matt disappears into the en-suite bathroom to spit.

“Wish I could but there’s a big delivery coming this morning and I gotta be there.”

Kelly pouts at him from the bed so Matt walks over and straddles him. Leaning down to kiss Kelly long and deep.

“It won’t be a late one. I promise. I’ll make dinner, whatever you want and we can watch a movie or something.”

“That sounds alright. I guess.” Kelly says still pouting.

 

Kelly is eating breakfast and watching crappy late morning TV when Shay finally stumbles in carrying her heels instead of wearing them.

“Walk of shame?”

“Stride of pride.” She declares, collapsing next to him on the couch.

“You look like hell. What happened after we left?”

“Well once you two and the kids were gone. Things got serious, shots, chugging beers all the usual mistakes. You look very chipper this morning. What happened when you got home?”

“Just a little somethin’ somethin’.” Kelly says suggestively.

“Ahhh is Matt still sleeping it off?” Shay asks wiggling her eyebrows.

“No, he had to go to work and we didn’t have sex.”

“You just said -”

“I said a little somethin’, just a little shower fun is all.”

“Kelly you know when I told you to prove to him that you were serious. I didn’t mean prove to him that you were part monk. Will you just fuck the man already it’s been like four months.”

“Yeah, yeah I know, it’s lasted a little longer than I expected it to but you see I have a plan and it only works if we wait until next week.” Kelly beams at her, smile almost splitting his face in two.

“Ohhhhhhhhhh care to share?” Shay asks now intrigued. She was also starting to worry for their health. The sexual tension in the apartment was getting ridiculous.

“Yes because I’m gonna need your help.” Kelly tells Shay his plan and she of course agrees to help in a heartbeat.

The odd couple spend the day lazing around, Shay recovering from her hangover and Kelly making sure he’d thought of everything to carry out his (in his opinion) genius plan. When Matt gets back, he as promised makes dinner and the three friends eat before cuddling up together on the sofa, with Shay snuggled in the middle, to watch a movie.”

 

 

 

Everyone’s eating breakfast in the common room when the trio arrives, busting through the double doors laughing and joking as they head for the locker room to change out.

Herrmann and Mouch, the two veterans of the group share a look before Herrmann says.

“Just like old times. Thank god those two idiots are friends again.” 

“Yeah it was a little tense around here.” Otis understates.

“What are you talking about it was hell. Like walking on egg shells next to two sleeping bears.” Cruz comes back with.

“Because you two never fight.” Mouch throws in from the couch.

“We banter, friendly back and forth.” Otis comes back with.

“You two never shut up is the problem.” Herrmann adds.

 

Noticing the confused face Mills was pulling Mouch asks. “Something on your mind Mills?”

“Yeah. No. It’s just – I don’t understand a few months ago when I got here, I thought the lieutenants hated each other but now… I just don’t get it.”

Herrmann decides to answer this one. “Those three knuckleheads and Andy used to be inseparable. After what happened there was a lot of anger, blame and guilt flying around. They took it out on each other and Shay got caught in the middle.”

“That kinda makes sense.” Mills says beginning to understand but knowing that he wouldn’t truly understand until he lost a fellow brother. He hoped he never understood what that felt like.

“You weren’t here for the time they beat the hell out of each other.” Mouch throws from the couch, finally looking up from his newspaper.

“What!?” Mills asks a little shocked.

 

“Come on Casey! I wanna go dancing and Severide won’t go with me.” Shay’s pleading brings an abrupt end to the conversation, Mills would have to wait and see if he could find out more about his two confusing lieutenants later. 

“Why do I have to go? Can’t Dawson go with you?” Matt complains.

“She is coming, but I wanna go dancing with my boys too. Pleeeease. I’ll make you my famous fajitas and margaritas.” Shay bribes.

“Dammit Shay you know me too well.” Matt concedes, no one could say no to Shay anyway.

 

 

Mills waits, biding his time, until Casey, Severide and Shay had left the common room to get on with their work before sliding into the chair next to Herrmann and opposite from Cruz and Otis.

“Seriously. What am I missing?”

“Mills what the hell are you talking about?” Cruz asks, Mills has been acting shifty and weird since the lieutenants got in.

“Casey and Severide. What’s the backstory? I’ve never seen anyone go from friends to hating each other as fast as they do.”

“I know, I swear I nearly got whiplash once watching them bounce from one to the other.” Otis says dramatically while rubbing the back of his neck.

 

“Last time it was that bad was when Severide first transferred in.” Capp joins in the conversation, taking a seat at the table.

“Yeah that was rough.” Mouch remembers.

“Well what happened then? How come they go from friends to hating each other?” Mills asks again, needing some kind of answer.

“Wish we knew kid.” Herrmann sighs before adding. “They’ve known each other a long time, went through the academy together. Casey was a candidate here and Severide was at another house but when he made squad he got transferred in and they were at each other’s throats from day one.”

“There were rumours.” Mouch muses out loud.

“What rumours?” Mills asks increasingly interested and sitting on the edge of his chair.

“I wouldn’t put too much stock in any of that.” Herrmann dismisses.

“Oka-y but what were the rumours?” Mills pushes feeling like his head was going to explode.

“The rumour was that they were close – really close.” Otis says over emphasising the word really.

“What – like a couple!? Like they dated!?” Mills asks disbelieving. Maybe his head really was going to explode.

“That’s the rumour, but that’s it no one knows anything else.” Cruz clarifies before Capp adds.

“Or if it’s even true.”

“Which is why I call bull. They’re both so competitive it’s probably just left over testosterone from the academy. Severide was top of their class but Casey was second. They’ve always been neck and neck. Which is probably why they’re always at each other’s throats.” Herrmann gives his opinion.

“I’ve seen men do many stupid things over testosterone but I think whatever was wrong with them went a little deeper.” Gabby gives her take on when Severide first arrived at 51, having been listening to this now group discussion.

“Gabby you should never underestimate how simple minded men can be.” Herrmann gets the final word as Severide walks in and grabs a cup of coffee.

 

The bells sound and Mills doesn’t get a chance to ask any more questions for the rest of shift but now his mind was reeling. The idea that Casey and Severide were once a couple was stuck in his head like an earworm.

 

 

 

Kelly and Shay had spent the week preparing for Matt’s big surprise. Shay was so proud of how Kelly had owned up to his feelings and done everything he could to prove how much he loved Matt. She knew from personal experience how hard that could be. She was also impressed by the romantic evening he had planned, Shay had helped with the organising but everything was his idea.

 

Matt knew Kelly had a surprise planned for Friday night. He’d told him to make sure he had the night completely free. Matt had butterflies in his stomach and it was only Wednesday, it felt like they’d just started dating. He was excited for whatever it was that Kelly had planned but he really hoped he planned for the evening to end in sex. The thought of being with Kelly again, like that. It made the hairs on his arm stand up, a shiver run down his spine and a warm feeling to curl in his gut. Oh great now he needed another cold shower, he’d taken so many cold showers lately that they barely made a difference anymore.

 

Kelly was excited for Friday night but also nervous. He wanted everything to be perfect. He’d checked the list he made about 100 times, so he didn’t forget anything. Kelly was also more than a little nervous to sleep with Matt again, hoping he could live up to the expectations he knew they both had. Kelly was just as excited as he was nervous to be with Matt again, they both knew that Friday night was the night. It had been almost impossible to keep their hands off each other all week, the anticipation building with each day. The reservations at the fanciest restaurant in town were set. Shay knew what she was doing to help before she disappeared to Dawson’s on the pretext of having a girl’s night. Giving the couple the apartment for the night.

Authors note: (BTW Kelly isn’t the only one who’s nervous about meeting expectations)

 

“Shay, Shay, Shay I’m freaking out. What if I forgot something?” Kelly babbles as he runs over to Shay who was pouring herself a coffee. She calmly puts the pot back before turning and lightly slapping him across the face.

“Okay, calm down. We spent an entire week planning tonight. You didn’t forget anything. Just stick to the plan and everything will be fine.”

“Thank you, that helped.” Kelly says and kisses her on the forehead.

“I do what I can.”

They’re walking towards the stairs when Matt comes half way down and they both stop in their tracks. Matt’s wearing a dark blue three piece suit, with shiny black shoes, his hair styled so there’s a small curl at the front. He looks stunning. Kelly is staring open mouthed, he can’t believe he got so lucky to have this beautifully handsome man back in his life.

“What are you two staring at?” Matt asks a little self-consciously.

“You look – so…” Kelly can’t find the words to describe.

“I think I’m 5% less gay.” Shay says before slipping away to her room to give them a little privacy.

Matt comes the rest of the way down stairs and Kelly pulls him into his arms and a gentle, loving kiss.

“You look perfect.” Matt blushes at the compliment. As soon as they leave Shay gets to work on transforming their apartment for Kelly’s plan.

 

The restaurant is romantic, the food is fantastic, the wine is perfect but none of that could compare to the company both men had. Holding hands over the table and looking into each other’s eyes is when Kelly decides to ask Matt something important.

“Matty I got a question for you.”

“Sure what is it?”

“Will you move in with me?”

Matt nearly chokes on his wine at the question. While Kelly may have unceremoniously thrown the question out, it didn’t feel sudden. It felt right, they practically lived together anyway and Matt loved being so close with Shay again, she really had gotten stuck in the middle of their idiocy.

“As long as Shay is okay with it. I’d move in tomorrow.”

Kelly squeezes Matt’s hand. “I already asked her, she’s more than okay with it.”

“Then I guess I’m moving in.” Matt really wanted to kiss Kelly but neither of them were that comfortable with PDA moments and you never knew who would see you. They didn’t want their friends to find out like that. They’d tell them when they were ready.

 

“Can I interest either of you gentlemen in dessert?” The waiter asks after sneaking up on them.

“No, I think we’ll jut take the cheque.” Kelly answers for them both, knowing that the hungry, lustful look in Matt’s eyes would be reflected in his own. The waiter disappears to fetch the bill. “Before you say anything, this was my idea and I asked you out so I’m paying.”

“Okay Mr man. You pay I’m gonna go the restroom before we leave. Meet you out front?”

“Sure.”

 

The second Matt is out of sight Kelly pulls out his phone to text Shay.

‘He’s moving in! We’re about to leave, be home in 25 mins.’

‘YAY!!!!!! I knew he wouldn’t say no. Putting on the final touches now and I’ll be gone before you get back.

 

 

When they get to the front door Kelly pulls out a brand new key for Matt. “You wanna christen your new key?”

“You were pretty sure I’d say yes.” Matt opens the door and sees a trail of rose petals and candles everywhere. “You were really pretty sure I was gonna say yes.”

 

They walk to the middle of the room, Matt taking it all in and Kelly showing his nerves for the first time that night asks. “It’s too much isn’t it? Too romantic, too girly?”

Matt takes Kelly’s face in his hands and kisses him, deep and full of passion. “It’s perfect, I love it and to hell with too girly. I like a little romance every now and then.”

“I’ll remember that.” Kelly runs his hands down Matt’s back to his ass and squeezes. “There’s more upstairs if you’re interested.”

“I’m very interested, been looking forward to this all week.” Matt sneaks his hand to the front of Kelly’s pants and strokes him through the fabric.

Kelly pulls Matts hand away. “There’s something I wanna say before we get to that. Here in what is now our house. Do you know what today it is?”

“It’s the 14th. Matt says a little confused where Kelly is going with this.

“It’s the anniversary of us graduating from the academy. I want us to start this again better than we did the last time. So I promise that I will be right next to you when you wake up tomorrow morning and I promise that I’m never going anywhere or that I will ever do anything as stupid as that again. For as long as you’ll have me.”

“Damn it Severide. You’re gonna make cry. I wanna promise you something too. That I’ll never push you away again. I know I keep things hidden inside a lot but I’m gonna try to let you in more.”

 

Bathed in the moonlight streaming through the living room windows the two men hold and kiss each other. What starts as tender soon becomes heated until Matt remembers what Kelly had said. “Wait, you said there was more.”

“I did, didn’t I.”

 

Kelly leads Matt upstairs still following the trail of rose petals until they reach the bathroom. Opening the door he finds the bath tub full, steam still rising from it and a bottle of wine chilling away in an ice bucket next to two glasses.

“I don’t know about you, but I’ve been a little tense lately.” Kelly starts standing behind Matt helping him out of his jacket and vest. “And a little nervous about tonight. I thought this might help us unwind.” Kelly finishes kissing Matts neck and slowly unbuttoning his shirt.  

Matt couldn’t say anything, feeling a little chocked up that someone would go to all this trouble just for him, so he leans into the touch before turning around to help Kelly out of his suit too.

Kelly pours the wine as Matt steps into the bath, quickly joining his lover to sit behind him, Matt’s back against Kelly’s chest. They sit in peaceful quiet for a while not needing to talk, just enjoying soaking in the hot water, sipping their wine and the touch of their bodies.

After a while Kelly begins to run his hands over every part of Matt he can reach, avoiding his half hard cock for now. Matt felt like every nerve ending on his body was coming alive and starting to sing. Kelly’s hands everywhere all at once, squeezing his muscled biceps, tickling down his sides, massaging his chest, pinching his nipples all the while kissing his neck and gently rubbing his own growing erection against his ass.

Eventually Kelly settles on Matt’s now fully hard cock and he can’t suppress a full body shiver and gasp. One hand stroking him firm and even, the other hand still running over his chest and occasionally flicking his nipples. When Kelly starts to stroke him faster Matt throws his head back against Kelly’s shoulder and grabs hold of the strong thighs on either side of his body. The thighs that could take his weight and hold him in place as the man they belonged to fucked him into oblivion.  

Matt groans at the memories, pulled back into the now by feeling Kelly’s hand paying extra attention to his cock head and the other man’s cock rocking against his ass in time with the strokes to his own cock.

“Fuck. Kelly, I’m not- gonna last much longer.” Matt pants and groans out, toes curling in the water, back arching out of the water. Kelly pulls him in tight to his body pinning his back to his chest, hooking his legs over Matts to hold his hips in place and rutting wildly against his ass. “Come for me.” He growls in his ear.

Those words. That voice. That did it. As if on command a powerful orgasm rips its way through Matt’s body, muscles spasming as he thrashes against Kelly’s body, splashing water onto the floor before finally relaxing back against Kelly to catch his breath.

Still coming down from his high Matt turns over in the water to kiss Kelly long and deep, reaching for his cock but Kelly brings his hand up to his lips and kisses the inside of his wrist instead a known sensitive spot for Matt, it sends a shiver through his still floating body.

“I’m good baby.”

“Really? You came?” Matt asks a little surprised and a little disappointed, he wanted to return the favour. If they weren’t in water he’d probably have Kelly’s cock in his mouth already, the thought makes him salivate a little.

“You just looked so damn good. I couldn’t help it. Your muscles rippling, watching the pleasure wash over your face and body. All the noises you make. Your ass pushing back against me.” Matt starts to blush at Kelly’s words and shiver from the hands running up and down his back. “I could eat that ass out for days.” Kelly finishes grabbing Matt’s ass for added effect.

 

They stay wrapped up in each other’s bodies and a glow of post coital bliss until the water starts to go cold. Drying themselves off and heading to their bedroom each with only a towel around their waist.

“I guess this is officially ‘our’ bed now.” Matt muses standing at the foot of the bed.

“Then we should definitely christen this as well as your key.” Kelly says coming up behind him and removing the towel.

“No sex for months then twice in one night aren’t I lucky.”

“Well if you don’t want to anymore we don’t have to.” Kelly starts, grinding his cock against Matt’s ass. “But all I’ve heard the last month from you anytime I touched you or kissed you just a little too long was Kelly, Kelly I want you inside me, I need you inside me. Kelly fuck me please. I need you. Do you have any idea what that did to me? How much restraint it took to not push you against the wall.”

Kelly spins him around and actually pushes him against the wall. “Pick you up.” Again Kelly picks him up, grabbing his ass and lifting him up, Matt instinctively wraps his legs around Kelly’s waist. Both their cocks stirring and coming to life again. Matt always got turned on by how Kelly could manhandle him to wherever he wanted him. Kelly kisses him hard and full of passion, bending his knees slightly to take Matt’s weight, he runs his hands up his chest and arms, pinning them above their heads. Kelly grinds his fully hard cock against Matt’s ass.

Finally breaking the kiss, Kelly growls in Matt’s ear. “Or throw you down on the bed.” Again Kelly does exactly what he said. Turning them and dropping Matt on the edge of the bed. Leaning over him, trapping their cocks between their bodies and kissing him just as passionately before. “You’re gonna have to pay for that. To feel some of what I felt.”

Kelly kisses his way down Matt’s body before taking his cock in his mouth. Taking Matt as deep as he can and bobbing his head. Pulling off him as soon as Matt moans and kissing up and down the inside of both thighs.

“Oh god I’ve missed this ass. Such a cute little hole you’ve got.” Kelly licks a stripe from Matt’s hole to just behind his balls putting pressure on his perineum. Matt is losing his shit at this point.

“Ahhh, Kelly you’re killing me.”

“Say it, say it again for me.” Kelly groans as he pulls Matt’s legs over his shoulders and goes back to teasing Matt’s hole with his tongue.

“Kelly I need you please. Fuck me, I want you inside me.” Matt babbles getting desperate he’d been waiting for this for so long.

“I’m right here baby.” Kelly soothes one hand on his stomach to ground Matt the other grabbing the lube he’d hidden earlier. He circles Matt’s hole with his tongue, teasing him into a writhing mess before finally breaching the tight ring of muscle.

“Kelly please, you’re gonna make me cum.” Matt all but whines.

Pushing his finger inside and hearing Matt let out a deep groan makes Kelly’s dick twitch. He’s been waiting so long for this and now that it was here he wanted to draw it out for as long as possible. Before long Kelly has three fingers inside Matt and he is begging Kelly, writhing and moaning tossing his head from side to side, back arching, panting hard. God he looked perfect.

Kelly can’t wait any longer so he moves them up to the head of the bed, wrapped up in each other’s bodies he finally pushes inside that tight heat. They both moan, Kelly stays still for a moment letting Matt adjust and needing a second himself so he didn’t cum yet. Matt pulls Kelly down for a kiss full of love and much less frantic than they had been a minute ago.

“I love you Kelly.”

“I love you too Matty.”

Moving together in a perfect rhythm until they both reach their second orgasm of the night.

 

After cleaning up a little they cuddle up in bed, Matts head on Kelly’s chest he says. “That was worth the wait but I never wanna wait that long again.”

“Deal.” Kelly agrees.

 

As promised Kelly was right there next him in the morning sleeping soundly. Well it had been a long night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there is a character, scene, call or plotline you would like to see in this story, drop me a comment and I'll try to work it in. 
> 
> AN: When word tries to correct hole to whole and you’re like, no that’s not what I’m talking about.

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone has any suggestions or spots any mistakes, feel free to let me know. :)


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